Losing my BF and believe it's due to BPD

[ConfusedMeg]

I'm not sure I'm in the right place.

I recently moved in with my boyfriend and it has not been three weeks and I'm already moving out. As I continue to study BPD I feel I may be suffering from this disorder. The problem is that him and I got into an argument. His way of dealing with things is to shut off emotionally. So for te next 24 hours he did not speak to me and left until 2:30am with out even stating where he was going. Which is fine, but I've been here for almost three weeks and he has done this 5 different times.

When I attempted to talk he wouldn't. And I finally said enough. And asked to move out. He is in the right for following through on making this happen but I feel I was seeking some sort of attention. I hate being ignored. And him and I have faught about this since almost the first week of dating. I like to communicate and he likes to avoid it. For days weeks if needed. There was a promise this would stop but it's only escalated. The next day after asking to move we got in a heated argument. Where I ended up throwing a vase and yelling. He had booked me a flight back home without acknowledging I stated I needed to two days to get my ducks in line. After all was said and done I thought back on the relationship. He has provided for me and bent over backwards to make sure I'm comfortable. We have gotten along amazingly however the biggest barrier is the communication and how he shuts me out. I think a normal person would give him space but I pushed and pushed because I was scared I was going to be let go. And I think I made it that out come all my own by not giving him space. I've been emotional and moody since being here. And now I'm devestated and think I am borderline personality but not yet diagnosed and trying to find some closure on if my actions have allowed for this and what I can do to better myself moving forward.

[PLEASE - NO RUN MESSAGES]

PLEASE - NO RUN MESSAGES This is a high level discussion board for solving ongoing, day-to-day relationship conflicts. Members may appear frustrated but they are here for constructive solutions to problems. This is not a place for relationship "stay" or "leave" discussions. Please read the specific guidelines for this group.

[Rapt Reader]

Hello, ConfusedMeg... .I'm really sorry for all of the troubles you and your boyfriend are having. The members of this Board are doing what they can to preserve their relationships, and helping each other in that endeavor. You mention that you think you might have BPD? Have you ever been diagnosed with a disorder? Do you think your boyfriend might have BPD?

This site is actually for the family members and loved ones of people with BPD, not actually for people with BPD themselves (unless they are here because they believe their loved one has BPD or BPD traits and are here to learn how to deal with them). The links to the right-hand side of this page will give you a better understanding of what a person with BPD is going through, and how to deal with a loved one by learning new communication tools and techniques.

Reading every single link, especially The Lessons, will be very helpful to you in figuring things out relating to your relationship. If you are here to learn how to deal with a BPD boyfriend, then that works... .If you are wondering if you, yourself, have BPD, our sister site would be a better fit for you: Resources for BPD Sufferers, since we aren't really qualified to help you figure that out... .

Hope this helps, ConfusedMeg