It does get better

[Family Court Strategies: When Your Partner Has BPD OR NPD Traits.]

After a half year of no contact she called me last week.

She was crying like never before and in need to talk to someone but she wasnt sure if it was right to call me.

She was a mess, her life was a mess at all levels without mentioning her current relationship.

I just let her talk and cry. I didnt judge her, i tried to ask some questions to make her see and analyze with me into her web of confusion. The only thing i did said was suggesting her to go see a therapist. I never told her the fact i think she is a pwBPD.

She said she understands why i am not contacting her, she wouldnt like a friend like herself either, she doesnt like herself at all, she isnt good, she is fake, she lies, selfish... .and all of these things she said about herself. Perhaps longing for confirmation which i didnt gave her. I dont get the fact she doesnt like herself and never wanted to hurt me but her actions are the opposite. If she doesnt like herself why is she so egocentric?

Next day she sended a message saying she made an appointment and thanked me for taking her call.

After this half year of no contact and suddenly again, i do feel different then ever before. I feel its all her needs and has nothing to do with love or missing me. And somehow i am so happy that i see that and i feel detached in my heart which feels soo good!

Hang in there people, it does get better!

[icecream]

After a half year of no contact she called me last week.

She was crying like never before and in need to talk to someone but she wasnt sure if it was right to call me.

She was a mess, her life was a mess at all levels without mentioning her current relationship.

I just let her talk and cry. I didnt judge her, i tried to ask some questions to make her see and analyze with me into her web of confusion. The only thing i did said was suggesting her to go see a therapist. I never told her the fact i think she is a pwBPD.

She said she understands why i am not contacting her, she wouldnt like a friend like herself either, she doesnt like herself at all, she isnt good, she is fake, she lies, selfish... .and all of these things she said about herself. Perhaps longing for confirmation which i didnt gave her. I dont get the fact she doesnt like herself and never wanted to hurt me but her actions are the opposite. If she doesnt like herself why is she so egocentric?

Next day she sended a message saying she made an appointment and thanked me for taking her call.

After this half year of no contact and suddenly again, i do feel different then ever before. I feel its all her needs and has nothing to do with love or missing me. And somehow i am so happy that i see that and i feel detached in my heart which feels soo good!

Hang in there people, it does get better!

[eyvindr]

ice cream,

Thanks for sharing. You sound like you're doing great!

e.

[Loosestrife]

This gives me hope. I only managed a few days NC and when we some it was all about how they wernt coping and how my departure had made things worse. Not at any point did they say they loved, missed or wanted me back. Nor did they ask how I was, although there was an  apology for everything Ive been through. How did you to half a year NC? I'm finding it hard as my ex keeps saying they are suicidal.

[BorisAcusio]

Thanks for sharing, icecream.