Who here found that when you stood up to her

[goateeki]

I might get the BPD Nobel for this example.  I told her that (after years of her paranoia, accusations, and being told that virtually everything I did, I did incorrectly) I needed her to behave in a way that conveyed that she wanted me in her life (rather than as some problem that she had to deal with).  I was immediately kicked out of my marriage.  Six months of MC with her screaming at me and a marriage counselor who was clearly out of her depth and unable to impose any order on the proceedings, and then I filed for divorce.  

Funny thing is now that the reality of the divorce is sinking in, she is crying poverty and begging me to help her.  I'm sorry, but she is a repulsive person to me now.  

[Restored2]

She split me over night (and I have NO idea for what, we never even had an argument or a disagreement in 6 months we dated) and then over a period of two weeks went on this weird behavior streak where she would get drunk and party every other day. Our communication went to almost nothing from 150 texts/day I used to get from her. It was hurting me but I didn't want to show it, didn't want to be that jealous possessive guy. After a couple of weeks I just couldn't take it anymore and since I thought I was in an adult relationship and adults talk to each other and figure things out, I decided to gently ask her to tell me what was going. So, I sent her a text saying that I knew she was going through tough things at work and a lot of stress in life, but if she wanted to talk about anything, I was there for her because I really cared about her. THAT text was enough for her to drop me over night. I didn't hear anything from her that day (for the first time in 6 months) and the next day she dumped me with a text where she called me her "good friend". It was so surreal, even all my friends were shocked and awed by this display of craziness... .

Hi Invictus01.  I can relate to your stunned and dazed position that you were left in.  We had an overall great and peaceful relationship that was abruptly stopped by her.  All of the loving and affirming text messages from her immediately dried up just prior, with me then receiving an email from her entitled "Goodbye" and a matching voice mail that was just as cold and harsh.  It appears that a trigger was a text that I had sent her inquiring as to how her intake session for a retreat for previously abused women went.  Her response was basically that it was none of my business.  It is all soo very surreal and confusing... . 

[Invictus01]

Hi Invictus01.  I can relate to your stunned and dazed position that you were left in.  We had an overall great and peaceful relationship that was abruptly stopped by her.  All of the loving and affirming text messages from her immediately dried up just prior, with me then receiving an email from her entitled "Goodbye" and a matching voice mail that was just as cold and harsh.  It appears that a trigger was a text that I had sent her inquiring as to how her intake session for a retreat for previously abused women went.  Her response was basically that it was none of my business.  It is all soo very surreal and confusing... . 

Yeah, the way everything ended, with her even throwing away gifts I gave her (I gave her a FitBit for her birthday, it stopped registering data the day I sent that text)... .I have only seen this kind of stuff when a guy mistreats a woman SO badly, one day she just throws him out of her life and everything that was associated with him. That's the same woman who introduced me to her parents (at hers and their request) a month prior to this and apparently the meeting went so well, she told me "That was so weird, that's the best I have seen my mother behave with the new guy I introduce her to. That was totally not like her". A month later she throws me out of her life as if I abused her. For the first few weeks I thought I was going insane trying to reconcile all this... .

[JPH]

My ex-NPD fiancee did exactly after I drew a line in the sand. With my ex-BPD girlfriend, she cheated after the longest period of peace and quiet in our relationship. It happened just when I thought everything was becoming normal and good... .and before I knew about BPD.

[Restored2]

Hi Invictus01.  I can relate to your stunned and dazed position that you were left in.  We had an overall great and peaceful relationship that was abruptly stopped by her.  All of the loving and affirming text messages from her immediately dried up just prior, with me then receiving an email from her entitled "Goodbye" and a matching voice mail that was just as cold and harsh.  It appears that a trigger was a text that I had sent her inquiring as to how her intake session for a retreat for previously abused women went.  Her response was basically that it was none of my business.  It is all soo very surreal and confusing... . 

Yeah, the way everything ended, with her even throwing away gifts I gave her (I gave her a FitBit for her birthday, it stopped registering data the day I sent that text)... .I have only seen this kind of stuff when a guy mistreats a woman SO badly, one day she just throws him out of her life and everything that was associated with him. That's the same woman who introduced me to her parents (at hers and their request) a month prior to this and apparently the meeting went so well, she told me "That was so weird, that's the best I have seen my mother behave with the new guy I introduce her to. That was totally not like her". A month later she throws me out of her life as if I abused her. For the first few weeks I thought I was going insane trying to reconcile all this... .

I hear you.  The mistreatment I received from her abruptly discarding me and coldly cutting me off is usually reserved for someone more deserving of such abuse.  I treated mine like a princess and her 5 children very well too.  I'm still trying to process the insanity of what has transpired 6.5 months after she broke up with me.