I think my exBPDbf has ESP

[Left broken and confused]

I got a phone call tonight from my ex. The timing is odd because last time I had a date he called and now again this time. Almost like he can sense when his hold on me is weakening. The conversation was pleasant and casual mostly. For the first time since our breakup he asked a lot about me. We even touched on a few serious issues which we didn't ever speak of. He said he will call me later tonight or tomorrow. Not sure what to make of this. We have remained LC mostly a text once in a while. Is it just a nice casual call or is he going to try to recycle? I am thinking he is having a problem with my replacement.  Does anyone have any idea what game we are playing this week?

[thatwasthat]

Sorry, but what is ESP?

[fromheeltoheal]

Well, maybe ESP, or maybe, since you're dating other men, your demeanor has changed and he senses it.  Someone who is focused on attachments and the fear of losing them full time like a borderline is notices subtle things that most miss, because they focus on it so much.  My ex would be hyper-vigilant about facial expressions, tone of voice, body language, you name it, which most of us are to some extent, but when things were going well between us and I was comfortable, I'd really pay attention to what she was focusing on, and jeez, the amount of work, focus and intensity she put into it was just exhausting, I don't know how she does it, then again she's had a lifetime of practice and she's motivated by fear.  Very difficult being her.

Anyway, I think you're on to something when you say he senses the attachment weakening; even though he's in a relationship an attachment is an attachment to a borderline, tough to lose, it means abandonment.  And I also think you may be on to something when you mention he asked a lot about you, a possible idealization phase, especially with promises of a follow-up.  Protection time, you and I may both be wrong, but the potential for reestablishment of an attachment, and therefore the avoidance of abandonment, is everything to a borderline.  So be careful, and take care of you!

[Left broken and confused]

I am sorry it is extrasensory perception or another words psychic. He seems to know just when to pop back in my life

[Left broken and confused]

Thank you heeltotoe. It was odd to have so many questions about myself and even my friends  (none of which he likes) I didn't think of it as a way to begin the idealization phase but it does make sense.