After everything that comes along w/ a BPD r/s, it finally took me reading uBPDh's texts to others to leave. Things had been rocky for our entire 11 years or marriage, this year was definetely the deal breaker. I had put up w/ everything you can imagine that can go wrong over and over. He left myself and our two kids in May for another woman. This was a diff. woman than the one he had a one night stand w/ in March that I forgave him for. And no... .this is not the beginning. Our oldest child is physically disabled w/ a rare congenital condition and I have hung on for so long especially the last two or three years, as she grows, for this reason.
Anyway, almost 3 months ago, his texts began syncing up with our childs' tablet. Everything I suspected and was still shocked to see began unfolding before my eyes. Even though we had had been estranged for almost 3 months (I let him live on and off in our home w/ myself and our kids during this time). But I was bothered this particular Friday in Aug. because he could only bring me and his kids $20 in financial support this particular weekend. I suspect now and even then there were drugs involved.
But this following Sunday texts start coming into our child's tablet from 2 different women. He had been entertaining them all weekend, and one longer than that. One chick he was arguing w/, I think they had been together longer than before his first infidelty he admitted to back in March w/ me. The other they had just gone out the Friday before. He bought them both dinner that weekend. From texts I realized girl #1 he was arguing w/, has some form of BPD, was threatening self mutilation and admitted for whatever reason this is why she had 100's cuts on her legs. She said in texts this is why she doesn't have custody of her children... .wow. He went and bought her bandaids and since has been trying to contact her (she cut him off a week or two after this weekend).
Chick #2, the one he hooked up w/ that weekend. I found out from following texts she's a bartender, assuming that's how they met. One of the first texts she sent him was of her feet in high heels and an empty box of Domino's pizza in the background asking him to come pick her up. Can I insert the pic here
? Well, she's a grandmother, and let him move in 2 weeks after all this happened. She has 2 teenage daughters and one adult child. We have two much younger kids and I could not imagine letting another guy around them for a long time, if ever, let alone 2 weeks!
I ended up confronting him about all of the texts and ended up filing a restraining order (alot left unsaid here) and for divorce. He's living w/ his high heeled gf, hasn't seen his kids in almost a month and a half. His family knows of his gf (although he won't even admit he's dating her to his Mom) and they are ashamed. MIL finally asked him to have his intregrated messaging disconnceted from our child's tablet a few weeks ago so that is the last I know of his where abouts, which is a blessing. But yeah, that's what it finally took for me to leave :/
