I was thinking ... .My exbf gave me the ST this summer for almost 2 wks. He came back to me which now I feel was a recycle. He told me had been w someone during this time but realized it didn't mean anything it was such an empty feeling. He felt himself just going thru that motions but realized he only loved me and wanted to give us another shot. Losing me the person he loves scared him. However, he was almost convinced since I didn't try to contact him I must have been doing the same thing as him. I have disagreed or argued with many non pwBPD bfs and never had I once thought they were forming another relationship during our brief "break". Thoughts?
Mine had said a similar thing once. That I easily forgot her and moved on because I didn't try to reach out to her. She said her fears of rejection were to much for her to reach out to me. I believe some of that is true. I believe she did want to reach out to me but felt I would've rejected her. At the time that was going on, her assumption was most likely correct. She also did mention while she was doing bad things to me (lying, cheating, etc), she did feel I was doing the same thing.
Ultimately, its about projection. They do bad things that they cast onto us to make us the bad guys. Mine, toward the end of our last r/s of a year, began punishing me for 'arguments and fights' we had in her head/dreams. She could not distinguish between fantasy and reality when she was in moments of dysregulation.
