Chump or Champ?

[Family Court Strategies: When Your Partner Has BPD OR NPD Traits.]

I read it here that some l are chump, some are champ. My first one was chump. After spending thousands, I realized. Later, I was told he got fired from his firm. I hired two new lawyers: associate who does paperwork and communicate with me, the head l who comes to meditations and court. They are super nice, kind, and want to settle out of court. The head l himself is the court mediator. However, after couple meditations, I had a conversation to be there as my l not my mediator.

After the second mediation, we got this email from BPD l. BTW, my l says he the l was reprimanded by the court for having sexual relationship with his client during domestic matter and an alcoholic which makes things hard for us to settle.   

--> I am somewhat dismayed, I have heard nothing from your office. This is especially frustrating since we had a settlement clearly outlined in the last mediation. Please advise. (no settlement is not close, they asked what they want)

My l: My apologies for the delay. head l and I are wrapping up a 9-day trial. I have drafted an addendum to the settlement agreement that my client and I are in the process of finalizing.

the next day M l: Please see the attached Addendum. For convenience, I am providing to you the word document of the addendum so that you can use the track changes feature if Mr. ... would like to propose any changes. If Mr. ... .is in agreement with the terms as written, please return to me the executed addendum.

My questions

1. Is our job (plaintiff) to draft an addendum? Could they have drafted and send it to us?

2. Is it common to word like this kind almost indicating we do expect you make changes? and here how you do it?

Are they just being professional? Or Are they too nice? Last month I complained for charging me for doing paperwork when the other l wanted to change the court date. I got the fee back. I do not want to complain for something like this but trying to figure out if I need to find another l. 

[Godslove]

I read it here that some l are chump, some are champ. My first one was chump. After spending thousands, I realized. Later, I was told he got fired from his firm. I hired two new lawyers: associate who does paperwork and communicate with me, the head l who comes to meditations and court. They are super nice, kind, and want to settle out of court. The head l himself is the court mediator. However, after couple meditations, I had a conversation to be there as my l not my mediator.

After the second mediation, we got this email from BPD l. BTW, my l says he the l was reprimanded by the court for having sexual relationship with his client during domestic matter and an alcoholic which makes things hard for us to settle.   

--> I am somewhat dismayed, I have heard nothing from your office. This is especially frustrating since we had a settlement clearly outlined in the last mediation. Please advise. (no settlement is not close, they asked what they want)

My l: My apologies for the delay. head l and I are wrapping up a 9-day trial. I have drafted an addendum to the settlement agreement that my client and I are in the process of finalizing.

the next day M l: Please see the attached Addendum. For convenience, I am providing to you the word document of the addendum so that you can use the track changes feature if Mr. ... would like to propose any changes. If Mr. ... .is in agreement with the terms as written, please return to me the executed addendum.

My questions

1. Is our job (plaintiff) to draft an addendum? Could they have drafted and send it to us?

2. Is it common to word like this kind almost indicating we do expect you make changes? and here how you do it?

Are they just being professional? Or Are they too nice? Last month I complained for charging me for doing paperwork when the other l wanted to change the court date. I got the fee back. I do not want to complain for something like this but trying to figure out if I need to find another l. 

[SamwizeGamgee]

My take is that if you are getting where you want to go, things are fine.  It's going to cost one way or another.  You don't want to be a complainer, but, then you don't want to get ripped off either. I understand.  But, in these things, I suspect lawyers find a way to make themselves rich in the process of our suffering.  Sounds bitter, but, they are professionals in a messy business.  They might take off the charge for reading the e-mail, then pad the charge for research and rebutting. 

As for the apparent back and forth, and wording of the replies, I would think that it's just lawyer jargon sounding extra nice so they don't catch the ire of the judge or the opposition.  There's a lot of bluster, and posturing, and over-kindness, in the legal department, but see what happens in when the rubber meets the road.  Again, are you getting good results?

Go forward.