Interesting turn of events...talk about karma

[Family Court Strategies: When Your Partner Has BPD OR NPD Traits.]

In speaking with my Lawyer today, I found out that because  he and I were together last July physically, we would not be able to file under the years separation! Now the only way to get a divorce sooner I would have to file adultery on him... .that will require 3 months separation. So, basically I am asking him to pay my court costs if he wants to file adultery and do a 3 months divorce or we can wait to file in July starting the year's separation over... .then file! He has to pay my health insurance all this time as well until we are divorced. I wonder how he is going to explain the pregnant gf due in May why he will not to be able to get divorced so soon now? Funny how being honest turns in your favor! I didn't have to do anything for "revenge" on him as we all talked about... .I just went to start the divorce proceedings and was honest! He is not going to be happy about all of this I am sure. Possible rage on this one!  No Contact for me is in full effect... .

[Herodias]

In speaking with my Lawyer today, I found out that because  he and I were together last July physically, we would not be able to file under the years separation! Now the only way to get a divorce sooner I would have to file adultery on him... .that will require 3 months separation. So, basically I am asking him to pay my court costs if he wants to file adultery and do a 3 months divorce or we can wait to file in July starting the year's separation over... .then file! He has to pay my health insurance all this time as well until we are divorced. I wonder how he is going to explain the pregnant gf due in May why he will not to be able to get divorced so soon now? Funny how being honest turns in your favor! I didn't have to do anything for "revenge" on him as we all talked about... .I just went to start the divorce proceedings and was honest! He is not going to be happy about all of this I am sure. Possible rage on this one!  No Contact for me is in full effect... .

[UVA2002]

Good for you just hang in there it all comes around.

[Confused108]

Lol! What goes around comes around!

[Pretty Woman]

! This is why I am anti-revenge. It always comes back to bite them in the ass.

[Beach_Babe]

... .and it couldn't have happened to a more deserving person. . Thanks for sharing, Blue

[Herodias]

Thank you all... .I feel kinda bad about it at the same time, (he will say I am not moving on), but I am trying to stick up for myself for once. I am certainly not going to commit perjury, when you never know if he would turn on me for that! I just don't know what he is capable of. I don't trust him at all.

[thisworld]

Hey Herodias!

I'm so happy that this gives you an advantage in terms of your insurance. I know that it was something on your mind.

Stay strong in your NC. It will give you lots of power to deal with the situation (because he may be very stressful in these times to comes).

All the best to you!

[Confused108]

Thank you all... .I feel kinda bad about it at the same time, (he will say I am not moving on), but I am trying to stick up for myself for once. I am certainly not going to commit perjury, when you never know if he would turn on me for that! I just don't know what he is capable of. I don't trust him at all.

Do not trust your ex at all. And yes I would not put anything past him that he would turn the tables on you. In a heartbeat. I have come to find that ppl who suffer from BPD can be the most spiteful/ vengeful ppl you will ever cross paths with. Be on guard. Good luck!

[Herodias]

Just FYI, I ended up emailing him of the news. I sent him a very well laid out e-mail that explained what happened and told him I was very disappointed in the news. I really am in some ways. It does help me slightly, but I am still married to him and I am really having trouble with this baby thing. I figured this would soften the blow when he gets an email from the lawyer. I think it worked, because I explained it would have been very embarrassing had we gone to court and told them we had been together during the separation and had to walk out and start again. That he understood. He still thinks we can get divorced soon, but he doesn't understand we have to re-file. He may not be divorced when the gf's baby comes! I bet he tells her we were together before she and him became an item or some lie (It was after the two of them went on their second vacation together)... .He still will not like the lawyer comes up with I am sure, but at least it has a buffer now.