Still reeling

[ADS1987]

My story could fill up multiple introduction posts. You name it, she's (my mother) done it. I am now a mother of nearly 3 years. Been with my loving, supportive, overly understanding husband for 8 years.

Anybody else feel regressed memories make their way back up as you make your way thru the parenting jungle? So many times have I cried and questioned myself as a mother when memories that even slightly resemble her come rising to the surface.

Just looking for other mothers with BPD mothers. So many stories to tell and share. Anyone else feel you could write a book?

[Naughty Nibbler]

WELCOME ADS1987:

I'm sorry that you had a disordered mom, who must have caused you a lot of pain. I can see that being a good mom yourself is very important to you.  It is great that you have a supportive husband.

Is it memories only that you find disturbing, or are you afraid that you might end behaving like your mother in some regard?

I don't have a BPD mom, but I do have a uBPD sister and had a disordered dad.  Other's with BPD moms will likely stop by soon with some helpful dialog.

[Kwamina]

Hi ADS1987

I would like to join Naughty Nibbler in welcoming you here.

Being raised by a BPD mother can really affect a child. I am sorry you are dealing with these difficult memories. Many of our members who have a BPD parent, find themselves getting triggered by certain things in their adult lives as a result of everything they've been through.

I am glad you have a loving, understanding and supportive husband. Having a good support network can be invaluable as you deal with these things. Are you perhaps also getting other support to help you deal with all of this? Do you perhaps feel like you are now suffering from (c)PTSD as a result of the way your mother treated you?

Take care

[Needless2say]

 
Welcome!
I think we want to do better as parents than what we had.  Then I think when we fail and everyone does now and again we feel that we are 'just like' our BP and it scares us.

Like if someone who had a 'normal' childhood says something to their child that their parent said they'd be like:  Ha!  I sound just like my Mother.  For us, it's like AAAAGGGGHHHHH, I sound JUST LIKE MY MOTHER!