Beck20ish
 Offline
What is your sexual orientation: Gay, lesb
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Romantic partner
Posts: 6
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« on: January 10, 2017, 12:20:20 PM » |
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Hi all,
I met a woman last sempteber through a mutual fiend and wham!
I'm an unhappily married woman with 3 kids and she just blew me away on the first night!
So full of character, I told her later she bounced in like tigger and knocked me off my feet!
I found out that night her mum comited suicide when she was 17, came from a broken home where I think dad was abusive to mum, she works in a prison and is abused daily even though she has moved up
The ranks well and is liked, she was married to a woman who ended up cheating on her and now has a baby with the man.
We met regularly, I spent a night with her, we were in contact ever day ft, calls and text, I learnt how she'd been beaten up by exs and cheated on, walked out on etc etc and couldn't understand why someone would do these thing to her! She was soo living, soo attentive my world my everything! She contastly told me I'd see her for what she is and I'd wish she would leave me, how she'd make me cry how that's always how it went for her because of who she is. then she went away on a course and got very stressed out so the text became less frequent. We met up one night and because I thought she was feeling low I'd said let's just have a cuddle as I didn't want her to think it was just a sexual relationship , she I think took that as I didn't wa t to be intimate with her. The next time I saw her she spent the day crying saying it didn't feel right, she'd never be happy etc I tried to readusure her that I loved her as I truly do and that I'd be there for her.
Over Christmas I was unable to met up with her a couple of times for various family reasons and then she just stopped texting all together,
Won't answer my calls etc.
My mum and friends are mental health workers and when I've told them about how she is they suggested she may be BPD.
She'd told me more than one ex had asked if she was bi polar and the doctor had said no. She doesn't self harm as in cutting but is heavily tattooed and said if she's in a bad mood a tattoo always makes her feel better so I'm assuming that is her self harm.
The silence is killing me!
I've tried and tried to call and sent daily texts telling her I love her and how amazing she is etc etc but the only time she has responded in the last week was when I said how awful I felt because of her being like this with me.
I know this is a very jumbled account of our time together but I'm just hoping someone can sheaf some light on it for me as I know I won't get answers from her.
The last couple of text said , she didn't feel well, said she was sorry I felt like this and nothing was intentional just that she was in a bad place and didn't know who she was.
Even though it has crushed me I've gone non contact today, deleted her number to stop myself from constantly texting and ringing for my own sainity.
What else can I do?
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