Hi PW,
Thanks for sharing your thoughts and agree with your perspective. In the end, the key is to heal and move on. I've learned that loving another means allowing yourself to be vulnerable. Walking around thinking about what was desired vs. what was occurring keeps me stuck.
Forgiving her is the beginning of healing. Holding on to anger, hurt and resentment keeps the poison within me.
Should she reach out to me, I would by nature be on guard and keep a healthy distance. The nature of this disorder from all that is posted here is to idealize, devalue, discard the nonBPD partner and repeat.
Truly, tragic and very very sad.
67HD