Betrayed by ex-boyfriend with BPD traits

[Depression = 72% of members]

The confusion from his behavior post break up made me search up the internet and realized he has traits of BPD. Reading posts here makes me feel like I'm not alone. So I decided to share some of my stories here... .

THE BREAK-UP STORY:
He broke up with me due to his 'anger', because I've said something that he deemed hurtful. As from my perspective, I couldn't understand why is he soo angry and I even contacted him wanting to sort out this misunderstanding. Guess what I received from him? insults, insults and lies. He told me I was a burden to him and he found someone else and is dating the other girl, and asked me not to pester him anymore. (i was painted black i guess)

The next week, he came by to return my stuffs. He went from being emotionless to saying 'I will forgive you no matter how many times you say sorry. But I will never forget what you said... .' and 'you are the best that I could find but sorry I can't right now, maybe in the future... who knows'. Few months post break up, I was in a complete mess and couldn't understand him and told myself he is just a jerk. I figured I couldn't let this break up affect my studies, and threw myself into work and friends to get over him. During those times, he would text me every couple of weeks but nothing about 'us'.

Three months later, we met up and he told me he realized his mistake and apologized for the break up (but he never said sorry for insulting me). We had a plan for the future, he told me he will not move on from me (i know, i was in love w him). He knows his anger costed him a r/s, however, his temper hasn't changed since. Anyway, fast forward to a few months later where we don't see each other often now, he told me he has met someone else.   He couldn't control the feeling and wished he had never met her. And he thinks she will be the last one for him (he said the same things to me too). He even admitted that he is a jerk. *isn't it confusing?* I was so flabbergasted and couldn't understand why would someone acted and felt the way he did. So I googled online and found his behavior can be only rationalized by 'BPD'.

MORE RANDOM STORIES:
There are so many things that I find similar with other posts. such as, he gets passive aggressive when things dont go his way. There was once I told him to takeaway his lunch because I'm eating the leftovers at home from yesterday. He got mad, went back home w/o meeting me. He later explained, he came all the way to have lunch with me but I asked him to 'takeaway', he got mad.

The other time, he asked me and a friend to wait for him outside while he pass something to his colleagues for a moment, moments later, we decided to find him and saw he was chatting with his colleagues. He was furious with me for doing that. He later explained that he felt that I didnt trust him. The friend told me he is scared of my ex because of that.

He is emotionally unstable. He appears to be more extrovert than an extrovert. He is talkative and passionate with strangers & new friends but never to his close ones. He told me his life is boring. He knows he has anger issues though. On the flip-side, he cares for his friends. He is helpful towards everyone.

___________

I think I was in a r/s with an undiagnosed BPD person. Or he might just have anger issues? I dont know. I wish he does not have BPD because it makes me sad as I did love him. Sometimes I sympathize him and I hope he gets better in dealing with his emotions. But everyday, I have to deal with the hurt feelings from this betrayal, while he is in love with someone else. How do I get over after being betrayed by someone I trusted so much?

[You are gold]

The confusion from his behavior post break up made me search up the internet and realized he has traits of BPD. Reading posts here makes me feel like I'm not alone. So I decided to share some of my stories here... .

THE BREAK-UP STORY:
He broke up with me due to his 'anger', because I've said something that he deemed hurtful. As from my perspective, I couldn't understand why is he soo angry and I even contacted him wanting to sort out this misunderstanding. Guess what I received from him? insults, insults and lies. He told me I was a burden to him and he found someone else and is dating the other girl, and asked me not to pester him anymore. (i was painted black i guess)

The next week, he came by to return my stuffs. He went from being emotionless to saying 'I will forgive you no matter how many times you say sorry. But I will never forget what you said... .' and 'you are the best that I could find but sorry I can't right now, maybe in the future... who knows'. Few months post break up, I was in a complete mess and couldn't understand him and told myself he is just a jerk. I figured I couldn't let this break up affect my studies, and threw myself into work and friends to get over him. During those times, he would text me every couple of weeks but nothing about 'us'.

Three months later, we met up and he told me he realized his mistake and apologized for the break up (but he never said sorry for insulting me). We had a plan for the future, he told me he will not move on from me (i know, i was in love w him). He knows his anger costed him a r/s, however, his temper hasn't changed since. Anyway, fast forward to a few months later where we don't see each other often now, he told me he has met someone else.   He couldn't control the feeling and wished he had never met her. And he thinks she will be the last one for him (he said the same things to me too). He even admitted that he is a jerk. *isn't it confusing?* I was so flabbergasted and couldn't understand why would someone acted and felt the way he did. So I googled online and found his behavior can be only rationalized by 'BPD'.

MORE RANDOM STORIES:
There are so many things that I find similar with other posts. such as, he gets passive aggressive when things dont go his way. There was once I told him to takeaway his lunch because I'm eating the leftovers at home from yesterday. He got mad, went back home w/o meeting me. He later explained, he came all the way to have lunch with me but I asked him to 'takeaway', he got mad.

The other time, he asked me and a friend to wait for him outside while he pass something to his colleagues for a moment, moments later, we decided to find him and saw he was chatting with his colleagues. He was furious with me for doing that. He later explained that he felt that I didnt trust him. The friend told me he is scared of my ex because of that.

He is emotionally unstable. He appears to be more extrovert than an extrovert. He is talkative and passionate with strangers & new friends but never to his close ones. He told me his life is boring. He knows he has anger issues though. On the flip-side, he cares for his friends. He is helpful towards everyone.

___________

I think I was in a r/s with an undiagnosed BPD person. Or he might just have anger issues? I dont know. I wish he does not have BPD because it makes me sad as I did love him. Sometimes I sympathize him and I hope he gets better in dealing with his emotions. But everyday, I have to deal with the hurt feelings from this betrayal, while he is in love with someone else. How do I get over after being betrayed by someone I trusted so much?