How To Break Bond

[Thistle19]

I was discarded in February by my husband of 18 1/2 years for another woman.  My girls and I are devastated. We are all in counseling and trying to move forward the best way we can.  I thought that I was doing better until I was charmed last week.  This threw me for a complete Loop and made me realize I am really no better now than I was 4 months ago.  I cried and cried and cried some more. How do I break this bond that I have with him?  I know I was in love with an illusion and the fantasy isn't real, but how do I move forward?  I just want to stop hurting.

[PLEASE - NO RUN MESSAGES]

PLEASE - NO RUN MESSAGES This is a high level discussion board for solving ongoing, day-to-day relationship conflicts. Members may appear frustrated but they are here for constructive solutions to problems. This is not a place for relationship "stay" or "leave" discussions. Please read the specific guidelines for this group.

[Tattered Heart]

Hi Thistle19,

I'm sorry you are feeling so hurt and confused. Are you hoping to salvage your relationship or are you wanting it to end and just want to stop getting pulled back in?

[Thistle19]

Hi Tattered Heart,

There is no chance of reconciliation.  He chose another woman.  I am having such a hard time letting go and, therefore, keep getting sucked in.  I guess deep down I still have hope. I wish I could go no contact.  I think that would help me heal.  Instead I am in constant contact because of the kids.  I need to learn gray rock, but the hurt is all consuming.  I'm just a mess.