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Skills we were never taught
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A 3 Minute Lesson
on Ending Conflict
Communication Skills-
Don't Be Invalidating
Listen with Empathy -
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Setting Boundaries
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Question: How do you find a professional to help you?
Can't find DBT specialist in our area for daughter - 0 (0%)
Can't find support group for parents - 0 (0%)
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Author Topic: I hate that I can't find help for us or our BPD 14 y/o old daughter  (Read 410 times)
LexiMae

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What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Child
Posts: 6


« on: July 23, 2017, 12:44:44 AM »

I have been researching trying to find support groups for us and for our daughter.  I get the same response... ."I'm not accepting new patients/clients at this time."

What do we have to do to find help?  

As I drove through the car wash today I looked over at my daughter and saw a HUGE scar on her upper thigh where she had cut herself.  She was irritated that I discussed it.  Apparently this cut was done in September.

Want to know what totally ticks me off?  Well... .I'll tell you!  I absolutely hate the law that states as a 14 year old they can choose what the medical professionals share with us... .US... .the parents that are footing the bill for treatment!  In and out of pocket expenses!  What the hell?

I understand that the law wants to protect the youth so that they will talk freely with the provider without parental input etc... .but where do we draw the line?

What I don't understand is why the medical field doesn't feel that self harm is concerning?  I've been told that self harm isn't what they are concerned with.  

Well that's just great!  I have a daughter that is physically scarred on her arms and legs... .but hey it's no big deal!

We can't find anyone to help us.  It's so frustrating!
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Our objective is to better understand the struggles our child faces and to learn the skills to improve our relationship and provide a supportive environment and also improve on our own emotional responses, attitudes and effectiveness as a family leaders
Lollypop
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Gender: Female
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Child
Posts: 1353



« Reply #1 on: July 27, 2017, 11:11:32 AM »

Hi leximae

Welcome to the forum. I'm so sorry to read your post, it's devastating to see our kids in pain. We all have that in common here.

Has your daughter been diagnosed?

I'd be very frustrated to find out that my daughter was self harming and not told. There are others here that have teenage daughters who self harm and will completely understand. My DS26 briefly cut when he was 15 and more recently did so when in crisis.

I live in the uk and so things are different here. As a parent of a minor aren't you allowed to discuss your child's therapy sessions?

What's going on now, have things changed any since your post.

Hugs

LP

 
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     I did my best. He told me I wasn’t good enough. White
Bright Day Mom
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What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Child
Posts: 243


« Reply #2 on: July 28, 2017, 09:50:54 AM »

I am sorry for the circumstances that bring you here and join LP in welcoming you

I live here in the states and can recommend NAMI (National Alliance of Mental Illness).  I found their services (free) invaluable during the beginning stages of the mental health crisis that hit our family nearly 4 years ago.  They may have support group for both teens and separate one for parents, often times run simultaneously, but in different rooms.

If NAMI doesn't have chapter in your immediate area, call a neighboring area for input.  They may be able to offer recommendations as well.

Good luck in your research, let us know how we can help.
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