Im still wondering if i am now painted white

[Idsrvt2]

Ive posted a few posts on here lately, but just need to get this off my chest and vent a bit i guess.   

no one in real life understands... .i think they think i must be crazy by now to not be over my x.   I really have no family any longer either. 

So, of course I think more about my x because my health is also not good nd he would massge my neck and despite all the push pull... .i thought he was someone in my corner

for those of you new to my story, my x is my  mail man... .he took out a false RO and i did the same last year... .he wanted everything dropped once in court.    So for many many months he would not enter my porch... i tried to talk to him in August and he practically ran from me.   I told him that due to my health i would be installing a new box... .which i did in the fall.

Now suddenly he is delivering to the box as if nothing ever happened... .  it is really just strange.   
ive been struggling with reaching out... .especially finding evidence online he either was cheating or dumped me for another person online.

this is just very very odd.   a guy that was so fearful of me... .now suddenly is being nice again?

or is it just because he thinks i wont be outside in the winter months?    i would think if i was painted white , he would contact me.     
I hate that he started doing this just when i was missing him again... .ugh

[Skip]

I know you have struggled with this for months and there has been a lot of indirect communication between the two of you regarding the mail delivery transaction he makes as your postman.

Respectfully, if was petty. A lot of us get wrapped in petty things and its understandable, but petty, no less.

As I understand it, you moved you mail box. And he has stopped the pettiness and is delivering as a normal postal employee should.

Good.

Now, what does it mean?

I'd encourage you to not try to read into it anymore. The pettiness has stopped - could be that his boss got to him, or a confidante, or he just tired of it.

Normally I'd say that if you want to know, just ask. But, given the difficulty in the breakup, anything short of him contacting you with an explanation, I would assume that it is over, done, and move on.

Take care of your heart.

[Idsrvt2]

yes, thats exactly what it was just plain petty.  I doubt anything got back to him... .i thought perhaps me leaving my packages on the porch and him picking them up was a sign in his twisted mind that i wouldnt attack him or something.   

I often wish my free counseling sessions did not end before the RO was lifted as I feel like now is when I need them the most

the odd part of all this is my outside box is still there... .

im used to relationships ending and having closure and still being friendly with xs... .certainly not having one walk around outside my house after all he did... .   no care just walks around like nothing ever happened living a great life.

i wish it was as simple as just moving on.   

[Idsrvt2]

ok, maybe i just got my answer just now... .he went speeding by my house so fast it made me look up from work im doing.its raining here as well... ... .like smh. he most likely still fears me.   

  its hard not to make note of this stuff... when its just a change and just so beyond odd.  im trusting my gut... something is beyond up with this... and im going to stay on guard.   

small complex and he used to just do a three point turn and avoid my road all together despite me being on the main circle in and out.   

its all just a new version of his games i feel... .believe me no way he would just suddenly start delivering inside my porch