Looking for ways to live with a BPD husband

[Juta]

Hi everyone. I am brand new here and don't know exactly how to proceed...I am married since 6 years and my husband definitely has signs of BPD, which he does not accept or acknowledge. We do visit a psychiatrist from time to time and she is sure that he does have BPD, but he does not accept it. Life with him is very tough. He has a small trading company, which he runs by himself. Since three months ago i was engaged fully in that company, but our constant fights made me step away. Now things are even more difficult, because he is punishing me constantly. We have two kids and according to him we would not be together if it weren't for them. Fights are not stopping and now he is becoming more and more malice toward me, because i have decided to stay home and look after the house and children. Blaming me that i have left, abandoned him, run away...so on and so on.
I am joining this group with hope that someone can give me advice how to handle this hell and how not to leave him, because that is really one thing i do not wish for.

[RELATIONSHIP PROBLEM SOLVING]

RELATIONSHIP PROBLEM SOLVING This is a high level discussion board for solving ongoing, day-to-day relationship conflicts. Members are welcomed to express frustration but must seek constructive solutions to problems. This is not a place for relationship "stay" or "leave" discussions. Please read the specific guidelines for this group.

[Ozzie101]

Hi Juta! Welcome to the family!

You'll find there are many people here who understand what you're going through. We've been there (or are still there) ourselves.

Life with a pwBPD can be difficult, absolutely. There are some very real challenges, as you've discovered. But, there is hope and things can get better. We have a lot of tools, tips and experience we can share that can help. It takes work, but it can be done.

I hope you don't mind if I ask questions. Details help us to know how best to help.

You say he's punishing you constantly. Punishing you how?

[COLB]

Juta,
You are not alone...I would like to ask about how the children are effected by the fighting?  How frequent are the fights?  Is there a pattern (FOG)?  What are his triggers?  Have you thought of boundaries to protect you and the children?

We are hear to listen and help if we can.  This is hard...very hard living with a BPD.  Children make it harder IMO.

B