Silent treatment?

[Lifeinthefastlane]

How do you respond?

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RELATIONSHIP PROBLEM SOLVING This is a high level discussion board for solving ongoing, day-to-day relationship conflicts. Members are welcomed to express frustration but must seek constructive solutions to problems. This is not a place for relationship "stay" or "leave" discussions. Please read the specific guidelines for this group.

[itsmeSnap]

Care to share a bit more about the situation?

[RBGE]

Before I give this advice, I feel the need to add the disclaimer that I do not now the details of your situation and no solution is universally effective.

That being said, my experience is that when my wife gives me the silent treatment it is a punishment/manipulation move on her part so I choose not to reward it. I immediately engage in self-care such as going to the gym, walking the dog (if you have one), retreating to a separate room in a different area of the house or getting together with a friend if possible.

My experience is that staying in the same room or area with her during the silent treatment only encourages her to keep using it as a weapon. Then again, this is only my personal experience that I can offer.

[ColdKnight]

I agree with RGBE. The silent treatment is total manipulation and don’t give in to it. My ex used to LOVE to do that to me however we did not live together so it was not responding to texts or calls. It then became a waiting game which she always won because I would break down after a week or two and reach out...

God I wished I could have stayed strong...

[Birddog]

One of the four horseman defines by Gottman, considered stage four in breakdown of relationship.

Helped for me to understand it was a coping mechanism to avoid hurt. It’s recoverable, probably most painful part of my marriage, had long bout back in March-April.

Discovered what it was after nearly destroyed me.

[RBGE]

I agree with RGBE. The silent treatment is total manipulation and don’t give in to it. My ex used to LOVE to do that to me however we did not live together so it was not responding to texts or calls. It then became a waiting game which she always won because I would break down after a week or two and reach out...

God I wished I could have stayed strong...

Hey man, please don't be hard on yourself for not staying strong. Just treat it as a learning experience.