Sister In Law, too?

[Our abuse recovery guide]

Well, the fun never ends.  My new SIL informed me she was diagnosed with BPD years ago.  She has been in therapy for years, though, but has stopped 2 years ago due to being tired of therapy.  My brother( her husband) has not been diagnosed BPD.  I can't really say he even has traits, but he does have other serious issues with mood that are un-diagnosed.  He also is a heavy drinker. They had a whirlwind romance  across 2 continents, now they are married , living in the USA and my bachelor brother at the age of 46 has 4 new step kids 18 years and under now. Oh and 6 pets.   I am befriending my new family, but also being on the look out to not be "sucked in".  I am disturbed to see my bro does not get along with the youngest ( 9) and I have major issues with this and have let him know this.  I have issues with the SIL putting up with this.  I know, not my place, but the kids are innocents in all this.

I first came to this Board this summer over my BPD adult son and discovering my Father has definite BPD traits.   I am going to have to up my readings on the BPD parent and sibling . 

I have my issues, I know ( not BPD) but I also have to catch up on reading here more regarding persons with multiple family members suffering from BPD. 
Thanks for the listen.

[Swimmy55]

Well, the fun never ends.  My new SIL informed me she was diagnosed with BPD years ago.  She has been in therapy for years, though, but has stopped 2 years ago due to being tired of therapy.  My brother( her husband) has not been diagnosed BPD.  I can't really say he even has traits, but he does have other serious issues with mood that are un-diagnosed.  He also is a heavy drinker. They had a whirlwind romance  across 2 continents, now they are married , living in the USA and my bachelor brother at the age of 46 has 4 new step kids 18 years and under now. Oh and 6 pets.   I am befriending my new family, but also being on the look out to not be "sucked in".  I am disturbed to see my bro does not get along with the youngest ( 9) and I have major issues with this and have let him know this.  I have issues with the SIL putting up with this.  I know, not my place, but the kids are innocents in all this.

I first came to this Board this summer over my BPD adult son and discovering my Father has definite BPD traits.   I am going to have to up my readings on the BPD parent and sibling . 

I have my issues, I know ( not BPD) but I also have to catch up on reading here more regarding persons with multiple family members suffering from BPD. 
Thanks for the listen.

[Jareth89]

Hi Swimmy, it can be overwhelming to find out you are dealing with more than one pwbpd/npd. I'm dealing with 3 (sil, her parents). The dynamics are tricky. These are not the same in-laws I knew 2 years ago. I feel it's all a deception and very weird. It's always sad when kids are involved. People try to carry on as normal but you can't really - someone has to address the dysfunction and say what is acceptable and what is not. What else can you do, pretend it isn't happening and play happy families?

[Kwamina]

Hi Swimmy55

It definitely can be quite challenging dealing with multiple BPD family-members. You had already been through quite a lot with your son

My new SIL informed me she was diagnosed with BPD years ago.

When and how did your SIL inform you about her BPD diagnosis?

I am disturbed to see my bro does not get along with the youngest ( 9) and I have major issues with this and have let him know this.  I have issues with the SIL putting up with this.  I know, not my place, but the kids are innocents in all this.

In what ways does it show that your brother does not get along with the 9 year old? How did your brother respond when you let him know you have issues with this?

The Board Parrot

[Swimmy55]

Thanks Jareth .
Kwamina- She informed told me her diagnosis while we were talking about my son .  She said she had BPD too and was in therapy for years but stopped.
My brother and his 9 year old step son.  It is obvious he doesn't like him , he eye rolls the boy when he talks.  And then I came out and asked him if he liked his stepson and he said" Honestly? No."  From here I talked to him further about maybe he needs to spend time one on one with the boy.  My brother meets me with "Yeah , I know..."    Which means he may or may not try to make things better with him.  And me, Here I am , almost itching to set things straight. however, I recognize this and am going to 12 step meetings to combat this.