If I was perfect I wouldn't have to feel bad about myself

[LFCNZ]

Just a thought that popped into my head that resonated with me.

I think my subconscious is always pretty much saying this to myself, make a mistake and your a failure.

Been thinking a lot about why I feel the way I do about myself, nature or nurture?

The more I read about how a parent with BPD can effect their children, definitely leaning more towards nurture these days.

[Kwamina]

Hi LFCNZ

Perfectionism is something many of our members have struggled with, often as a result of an internalized negative voice, an inner critic.

Pete Walker who has written extensively about adults who suffered childhood abuse, says the following about perfectionism in relation to shrinking the inner critic:
"My perfectionism arose as an attempt to gain safety and support in my dangerous family. Perfection is a self-persecutory myth. I do not have to be perfect to be safe or loved in the present. I am letting go of relationships that require perfection. I have a right to make mistakes. Mistakes do not make me a mistake. Every mistake or mishap is an opportunity to practice loving myself in the places I have never been loved."

Does this quote resonate with you?

The Board Parrot