How should reestablish contact?

[Depression = 72% of members]

My (M35) exwBPD (F36) was having a kid with someone else. I was helping out. I wanted to be there for her and the kids. She was a day away from giving birth and said that I friend requested her baby day, something I never did. She told me to stay away from her and leave her alone and do not contact her. She ignored me on Facebook Messenger. That was almost two months ago.

She said something similar in the past and two months later she reached out to me. I miss her and still want to be there for the kids. I know it's not an optimal situation, but I do want to be with her and want to be the father figure/father to those kids, especially since the dad is out of the picture. I know a lot of peole will say just move on but I really do not want to and will fight for this. What should be the next step to reestablish contact?

[wbrady11]

My (M35) exwBPD (F36) was having a kid with someone else. I was helping out. I wanted to be there for her and the kids. She was a day away from giving birth and said that I friend requested her baby day, something I never did. She told me to stay away from her and leave her alone and do not contact her. She ignored me on Facebook Messenger. That was almost two months ago.

She said something similar in the past and two months later she reached out to me. I miss her and still want to be there for the kids. I know it's not an optimal situation, but I do want to be with her and want to be the father figure/father to those kids, especially since the dad is out of the picture. I know a lot of peole will say just move on but I really do not want to and will fight for this. What should be the next step to reestablish contact?

[RELATIONSHIP PROBLEM SOLVING]

RELATIONSHIP PROBLEM SOLVING This is a high level discussion board for solving ongoing, day-to-day relationship conflicts. Members are welcomed to express frustration but must seek constructive solutions to problems. This is not a place for relationship "stay" or "leave" discussions. Please read the specific guidelines for this group.

[Radcliff]

If she reached out after two months last time, perhaps she'll follow the same timing.  You could wait a bit and see if she reaches out, or you could reach out.  The key is not to overpursue.  If you send her a message, say something simple like you're thinking of her.  Asking her to do something like meet you, or even asking her a question, might make her withdraw more.

How long were you together?  How old are the kids?

RC

[wbrady11]

Thanks RC for replying. I will definitely wait. We were together for almost 4 years. They are a little more than two months old.