I need help

[loosinmylight]

I am reaching out in hopes of finding like minded individuals who can help me help myself while dealing with a BPD person in my life. I am at the brink of walking away from someone I love very much. And I know that if there is a chance of salvaging this I want to find it. But I am becoming dangerously close to hurting myself in the process of staying. I need help in finding a way to communicate, that is fair for both of us. Where I am not always feeling like I have to give up my own integrity in order to appease him. That I am not always backing down off the ledge because it might affect him, that I am not always giving in because it's the best thing for him. The egg shell syndrome is becoming so intense that I'm almost afraid to open my mouth, in fear that there will be an issue (which can sometimes last until I am the one who apologizes)  I'm SICK of apologizing. And I'm about to blow my top. Only making things worse and me feel bad about myself. So...there's the immediate challenge at hand. Thank you.

[RELATIONSHIP PROBLEM SOLVING]

RELATIONSHIP PROBLEM SOLVING This is a high level discussion board for solving ongoing, day-to-day relationship conflicts. Members are welcomed to express frustration but must seek constructive solutions to problems. This is not a place for relationship "stay" or "leave" discussions. Please read the specific guidelines for this group.

[Ozzie101]

Welcome to the family, loosinmylight!

I’m so sorry for what you’re going through. It’s actually pretty familiar to hear around here. We’ve been there — or still are there. Because if that, we have a lot of experience to share and a lot of support to give.

Perhaps when you feel like it, you can share a few details? That can help us know his best to help you.

For instance:
How long have you and your loved one been together?
What sorts of BPD behaviors are causing problems?
Could you share a description of a recent incident — sort of a play-by-play?

Again, welcome! We’re here to help!