I learned the hard way that you have to specifically ask for the MMPI-2 (I think ForeverDad mentioned in another post that there is now an MMPI-3). My motion requested a psychiatric/medical evaluation and while that did lead to a forensic psychiatric evaluation, it wasn't the MMPI-2 (which is what was available at the time).
Instead, we had a forensic psychiatrist spend four sessions of roughly 3 hours each interviewing n/BPDx (following a psychotic episode, so it was for him only). The psychiatrist wrote a 12 -page report that didn't conclude in a dx, although it did provide a pretty damning and thorough summary of n/BPDx's emotional and psychological limitations. I believe her last paragraph said, "A PD cannot be ruled out and further evaluation is recommended."
With the MMPI-2, many questions are asked in a variety of ways that are not always evident to the test taker. And even more important, if someone tries to present a false front, that tends to show up in the results. The test has been validated many times so it can show that it's statistically less likely for people to represent themselves in a way that is not likely to be common in the population. I believe one member here had a spouse whose results were that she "presented falsely."
Sometimes the fear of too much sunshine can create magnificent stonewalling on behalf of the BPD sufferer. You may want to request not only the MMPI-2, but also that it be completed by day/date. Have your attorney offer three forensic psychiatrists certified to administer that particular test (that you have vetted), and your spouse can then choose from one. It's common for the opposing party's results to not be made available to you, altho the judge and other lawyer will see them.
My L was permitted to read the report to me but I was not allowed to look at the report or have a copy of it. My ex has a strong narcissistic streak and he found parts of the report flattering so he gladly allowed me to have a copy of his report. He was referred to in the report as having above-average intelligence, dressed nicely, looked younger than his years, and had a variety of hobbies at which he appeared to have excelled.
If your spouse is likely to stonewall and not do the eval, perhaps think of reasonable consequences for non-compliance. I don't know what would make sense in your case, but as an example, in mine we made compliance in the eval contingent on discussing changes to visitation. My ex dysregulated one night and had what was likely a psychotic episode (with help from ambien and god knows what else) and visitation was reduced to four hours a day Saturday and Sunday. He wanted overnights. He also liked representing himself in court (negative engagement was better than being ignored for him).
These evals tend to carry more weight when there is additional documentation to go with them, and if you have a third-party professional willing to testify, that's often the trifecta.
Even so, if you do have all that, be prepared for so much dithering from the courts it will set your hair on fire. I didn't seem to get the mom bias often discussed here, probably because my ex was an attorney and he seemed to get the white collar one-of-us discount that came with being part of the professional circle. He was given five and six and seven bites of the apple until I was finally given full custody four years later. Even a judge ordering a gatekeeping order to prevent frivolous motions being filed against me didn't stop the once a month on average trip to court.
We had the psychiatric evals, shocking amounts of email documentation (10K emails and counting), accusations of lying from n/BPDx (to the judge's face, mind you), n/BPDx's own lawyer withdrawing from the case, our parenting coordinator withdrawing from the case, a stunning refusal to comply with even the most minor parts of our divorce agreement (even when it would benefit n/BPDx to comply), threats to report everyone to their professional boards, doubling up of bailiff's during our once-monthly court appearances, loss of four appeals, refusal to pay legal fees, and the above-mentioned gatekeeping order that is essentially worth nothing when the court issuing it will not enforce it
)
In other words, pace yourself
I ended up with a positive outcome
finally, mostly because I am nothing if not tenacious and according to my L a credible witness. I began to depersonalize what was happening and treated it like a medical condition that I might have for life.
Feedback and support from this board made all the difference. I'm glad you're here gathering stories so you can navigate this stuff.
