Trying to savvy

[StartingHealing]

Hello all,

I'm trying to savvy something.  I understand that what gets said by wBPD is a reflection of what their current emotional state. 

I'm having trouble at the moment in accepting the small nuggets of positive that are directed at me.   

Not that I'm discounting wBPD emotions, it's since I'm always looking beyond what is said and attempting to figure out what is going on behind the scenes to give emotional validation, I'm having a time in accepting what is being said to me in the positive.

Any ideas?

Thanks 

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RELATIONSHIP PROBLEM SOLVING This is a high level discussion board for solving ongoing, day-to-day relationship conflicts. Members are welcomed to express frustration but must seek constructive solutions to problems. This is not a place for relationship "stay" or "leave" discussions. Please read the specific guidelines for this group.

[Jabiru]

In my experience, hidden meanings are a losing game and you wind up with false assumptions and hurt feelings on both sides. I take what my uBPDw says literally and I speak literally. If in doubt, I ask in clear language to confirm.

For validation, I mainly try to avoid being invalidating. Too much validation and it can seem forced.