Working on healing

[Our abuse recovery guide]

I really appreciate this site and everyone on it for helping me get through some really hard times.  I realize that I mostly post when I'm in crisis or venting and I don't give anything back.  So I'd like to start being more positive and open.  I just wanted to share something I learned today from being open and honest with the people around me. 

I recently had some bad health news and I'm scared.  Normally, I would stuff it down and just act like nothing happened.  This time I shared my fears and sadness with my family and my friends.  I felt so supported and loved and it made me realize that the narrative I heard from my BPD mum was not true.  She taught me that everyone outside the family could not be trusted,  and the world was a scary, hostile place.  Since I've been doing effective therapy and starting to heal, I've felt so much support and goodness from people. 

So yeah, trust the people you love and don't be afraid to ask for help.

[Zabava]

I really appreciate this site and everyone on it for helping me get through some really hard times.  I realize that I mostly post when I'm in crisis or venting and I don't give anything back.  So I'd like to start being more positive and open.  I just wanted to share something I learned today from being open and honest with the people around me. 

I recently had some bad health news and I'm scared.  Normally, I would stuff it down and just act like nothing happened.  This time I shared my fears and sadness with my family and my friends.  I felt so supported and loved and it made me realize that the narrative I heard from my BPD mum was not true.  She taught me that everyone outside the family could not be trusted,  and the world was a scary, hostile place.  Since I've been doing effective therapy and starting to heal, I've felt so much support and goodness from people. 

So yeah, trust the people you love and don't be afraid to ask for help.

[Pook075]

In many places, mental health has a stigma where people just don't talk about it- they see it as weakness and feel like it's shameful to ask for help or support.  Yet every single one of us goes though something in our lives that we're not prepared to deal with.  I still struggle with depression at times because my mind can be my own worst enemy if I start thinking about what I've lost or couldn't fix.  That's not healthy though, to hang onto those types of negative emotions, because it only brings us down and makes life harder overall.

It is so much healthier to say "I'm not okay right now" and just talk it out, to let it go.  Thanks for sharing!

[Turkish]

That's great that you were able to share and be safe
 and loved Zabava! Pulling free from the taffy of the projections of a parent with BPD is so tough. Your mother sounds like a Hermit. I hope your health issues can be resolved.

The Hermit is "a perfectionist, a worrier, and . . . an insomniac. . . Hermit mothers suffer from persistent fantasies of harm coming to themselves or others, and tend to attribute hostile intentions to others."

The complete discussion is here.