Diagnosis + Treatment
The Big Picture
Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde? [ Video ]
Five Dimensions of Human Personality
Think It's BPD but How Can I Know?
DSM Criteria for Personality Disorders
Treatment of BPD [ Video ]
Getting a Loved One Into Therapy
Top 50 Questions Members Ask
Home page
Forum
List of discussion groups
Making a first post
Find last post
Discussion group guidelines
Tips
Romantic relationship in or near breakup
Child (adult or adolescent) with BPD
Sibling or Parent with BPD
Boyfriend/Girlfriend with BPD
Partner or Spouse with BPD
Surviving a Failed Romantic Relationship
Tools
Wisemind
Ending conflict (3 minute lesson)
Listen with Empathy
Don't Be Invalidating
Setting boundaries
On-line CBT
Book reviews
Member workshops
About
Mission and Purpose
Website Policies
Membership Eligibility
Please Donate
September 28, 2024, 04:33:14 AM
Welcome,
Guest
. Please
login
or
register
.
1 Hour
5 Hours
1 Day
1 Week
Forever
Login with username, password and session length
Board Admins:
Kells76
,
Once Removed
,
Turkish
Senior Ambassadors:
EyesUp
,
SinisterComplex
Help!
Boards
Please Donate
Login to Post
New?--Click here to register
Parents! Get help here!
Saying "I need help" is a huge first step. Here is what to do next.
112
BPDFamily.com
>
Children, Parents, or Relatives with BPD
>
Son, Daughter or Son/Daughter In-law with BPD
> Topic:
Scars from cutting
Pages: [
1
]
Go Down
« previous
next »
Print
Author
Topic: Scars from cutting (Read 495 times)
almostvegan
Offline
Posts: 280
Scars from cutting
«
on:
March 17, 2013, 11:19:45 AM »
I'm sure many if you here experience the same thing: deep sadness when you see the scars from cutting. My d hasn't cut in almost a year. But the scars from old cuts are so visible that the pain of it is still there. I can't understand at all why someone would want to do that to themselves and the therapist can't give me a satisfactory answer either.
My d is happy and doing so much better but those scars just remind me how awful it can get.
Peace to everyone.
Logged
Our objective
is to better understand the struggles our child faces and to
learn the skills
to improve our relationship and provide a supportive environment and also improve on our own emotional responses, attitudes and effectiveness as a family leaders
jellibeans
Offline
Gender:
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Child
Posts: 1726
Re: Scars from cutting
«
Reply #1 on:
March 17, 2013, 11:36:50 AM »
that is good news... . a whole year!
My dd15 had gone three months and I thought that was a miracle ... . I know what you mean about the scares... . it is hard to look at but I hope in time they will get less.
I hope things are good for you all... . sometimes when things are going good it is hard to enjoy that because you are always looking for the other shoe to drop but don't stay in the past... . sounds like things are going well for you all... . so happy to hear good new for a change... .
Logged
griz
Offline
Gender:
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Relationship status: married
Posts: 859
Re: Scars from cutting
«
Reply #2 on:
March 17, 2013, 01:45:16 PM »
AV: so happy your daughter is doing well. I know what you mean about looking at the scars. DD goes for periods of times where she does not cut. Now is one of them but I still am so saddened by the scars on her arms and legs. I myself cannot understand why someone would want to do this but maybe this will help you. One time I was so upset by this and I was talking to her T and she said to me, "right now this is DD's only way of speaking to us. It is her only way of expressing her pain. It is hard for parents to see but for now this is how she deals with her emotions until she finds a better way". I am always praying that she will find a better way.
Griz
Logged
lbjnltx
Retired Staff
Offline
Gender:
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Child
Relationship status: widowed
Posts: 7757
we can all evolve into someone beautiful
Re: Scars from cutting
«
Reply #3 on:
March 17, 2013, 03:04:52 PM »
Hello almostvegan,
Good to see you here.
Thought reading the replies in this recent thread might help with understanding:
https://bpdfamily.com/message_board/index.php?topic=196545.0
Logged
BPDd-13 Residential Treatment -
keep believing in miracles
jellibeans
Offline
Gender:
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Child
Posts: 1726
Re: Scars from cutting
«
Reply #4 on:
March 17, 2013, 03:31:06 PM »
griz
you hit the nail on the head... . I do think this is why my dd does it too... . she just doesn't have the skills to express her feelings... . it is a cry we can't ignore
Logged
BioAdoptMom3
Offline
Gender:
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Relationship status: Married for 28 years
Posts: 336
Re: Scars from cutting
«
Reply #5 on:
March 17, 2013, 06:43:07 PM »
An entire year is great! CONGRATULATIONS on that! And yes, I totally understand what you are saying about the scars. It has been 2 weeks for our 13 y/o DD since she cut and as far as we know, had an episode of bulimia (do you also deal with the eating disorders?), but yeah, when I see the scars on the arms or even whenever she goes into the bathroom, all I can think of is those horrible things she has done to herself.
I am so happy for you though. A year is GREAT progress
!
Logged
Reality
Offline
Posts: 1102
Re: Scars from cutting
«
Reply #6 on:
March 18, 2013, 08:44:18 AM »
Dear almostvegan,
Such good news for you and your family! Yes, the scars are difficult to see. I am so happy that things are better, though.
Reality
Logged
almostvegan
Offline
Posts: 280
Re: Scars from cutting
«
Reply #7 on:
March 18, 2013, 11:18:16 AM »
It is great! Thank you for reminding me to look at that as a positive!
Logged
sisterandmom
Offline
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Posts: 42
Re: Scars from cutting
«
Reply #8 on:
March 22, 2013, 08:01:31 AM »
My daughter goes off and on with cutting. I am hopeful that the scars will disappear with time (mederma can help with the scars; however, she may want to have the scars for a while to remind her of how far she has come). I think there are different reasons for different people. But it comes down to wanting to pull the pain away from the inside to the outside. To feel a release. To stop feeling numb. Cutting releases endorfins and can give a brief uplift out of boredom or mental pain. It can be an attention getting mechanism.
When I had depression as a teen, I cut. It scared me so I scratched myself instead or hit the inside of my arms until they bruised. I still have the urges when I am depressed or angry. It is an addiction and one not easy to shake.
Logged
Can You Help Us Stay on the Air in 2024?
Pages: [
1
]
Go Up
Print
BPDFamily.com
>
Children, Parents, or Relatives with BPD
>
Son, Daughter or Son/Daughter In-law with BPD
> Topic:
Scars from cutting
« previous
next »
Jump to:
Please select a destination:
-----------------------------
Help Desk
-----------------------------
===> Open board
-----------------------------
Relationship Partner with BPD (Straight and LGBT+)
-----------------------------
=> Romantic Relationship | Bettering a Relationship or Reversing a Breakup
=> Romantic Relationship | Conflicted About Continuing, Divorcing/Custody, Co-parenting
=> Romantic Relationship | Detaching and Learning after a Failed Relationship
-----------------------------
Children, Parents, or Relatives with BPD
-----------------------------
=> Son, Daughter or Son/Daughter In-law with BPD
=> Parent, Sibling, or In-law Suffering from BPD
-----------------------------
Community Built Knowledge Base
-----------------------------
=> Library: Psychology questions and answers
=> Library: Tools and skills workshops
=> Library: Book Club, previews and discussions
=> Library: Video, audio, and pdfs
=> Library: Content to critique for possible feature articles
=> Library: BPDFamily research surveys
Our 2023 Financial Sponsors
We are all appreciative of the members who provide the funding to keep BPDFamily on the air.
12years
alterK
AskingWhy
At Bay
Cat Familiar
CoherentMoose
drained1996
EZEarache
Flora and Fauna
ForeverDad
Gemsforeyes
Goldcrest
Harri
healthfreedom4s
hope2727
khibomsis
Lemon Squeezy
Memorial Donation (4)
Methos
Methuen
Mommydoc
Mutt
P.F.Change
Penumbra66
Red22
Rev
SamwizeGamgee
Skip
Swimmy55
Tartan Pants
Turkish
whirlpoollife
Loading...