Have you read...

[BioAdoptMom3]

I Hate You, Don't Leave Me?  Is it worth the read?  Helpful?  Other thoughts?

Thanks!

Our objective is to better understand the struggles our child faces and to learn the skills to improve our relationship and provide a supportive environment and also improve on our own emotional responses, attitudes and effectiveness as a family leaders

[qcarolr]

This is a very "old" book, and gives a great amount of emphasis to the childhood trauma theories from the 1990's and earlier as cause of BPD. Was my first introduction to BPD in 2009 though, and first exposure to SET communication tools. The title sure applies to my BPDDD26 though - then and now and most likely for always. Or until she finds the path to accept greater responsibility for her self and treatment.

qcr  

[lbjnltx]

I believe your time investment would be better spent on "BPD in Adolescents" by Blaisse Aguirre for understanding of the disorder in teens or "Overcoming BPD" by Valerie Porr for understanding and skills to help her.

jmo

[BioAdoptMom3]

Thank you both so much for your comments and suggestions!  I appreciate it!

[muffetbuffet]

Don't remember the exact title off hand but the book stop walking on eggshells was very helpful for us.   The other thing that was so helpful was our daughter's recent RTF placement.  We had a fantastic family therapist and our daughter had a fantastic individual therapist.  The placement was as helpful for our daughter as it was for our family.  Now, I am NOT saying that all of our kids need to be put in placement out of the home, but for some it is what it takes to get things regulated.  Our daughter was adopted at age 7 and she is now 16.  Since arriving at our home, we have been through family based therapy three times, had one hospitalization, one RTF placement for 7 months and she is now on her third individual therapist.  All I can say is to keep plugging away.  One day at a time and one hurdle at a time.  As bad as some days are, others are that good.  Easter was horrible, but today was a day that I could only have dreamt about a year ago.  I attended a parent meeting at school and our daughter is doing so well that she is being permitted to move from 9th grade (second time around) to 11th grade in the fall.  She brought home a report card this nine weeks that was all As and Bs.  Guess the good times make all the bad times melt away

[griz]

OH muffet, how wonderful.  I bet your DD and your entire family is so proud of how far she has come and yes isn't it wonderful when we have those good days.  They rejunvinate us.

I am so happy for you and your DD.

Griz

[vivekananda]

good news muffetbuffet! Love it 

so very happy for you

Viv   

[BioAdoptMom3]

That is great news  !  Those are the times and moments that keep us going!

[jellibeans]

muffet

 

that is good to hear... .   great sign too! When they are doing well in school I think it shows they are making a real effort. so happy for you