shes txting agian

[simplyasiam]

hello all, i have same story here has many others. exg/f suffers from BPD. she leaves all the time.

this has been a big one for us. she been gone for 60 someday frist 30 where filled with coming and going lost of bad contact.

next 30 days we had n/c last friday we ran into eachother small talk for most part but a few i miss you.

to got 3 txt

1) how are you / me =good

2) kids next door are stay with us/ me = cool

3) im taking kids to city pool latter/ me = sounds fun

not sure what is going on if she is really missing me just having a bad day, honey moon is over with new b/f

want to be friends just being nice person head check to make sure ill still talk to her

this all gives me hope we can be together not sure if it should or not. i want her and kids back just dont want the cheating and leaving to keep going i know i would have to take things really slow with her to see shes geting help and learning

im sure some of you here have been down this road, or have seen

[Sparky2Blame?]

Sounds like you handled the contact rather well. And didn't divulge too much about you and whats going on in your text exchanges.  At this point, I think that was the right move on your part. You could ask her, flat out, what shes feeling and where her mind is at... . but it's doubtful you would get direct/honest answers about her intent.  She may not even know.  And there is also potential to be let down and disappointed by the answers, if you are "hoping" for something.

For me, I'm trying hard to let go and move forward.  And I simply have chosen not to respond to some inquires about how I'm doing and what is going on in my life.  At least not at this point in time.  It was hard, and felt a bit wrong/rude (not responding), but it has been better for me and what I am seeking.

How you want to handle contact and what you are comfortable saying/asking boils down to where you feel you are at.  What you want.  And how willing you are to risk potential pain that could come from it.

[simplyasiam]

hello sparky, i hope i did the right thing with the txt. i do want to build something with her again.

she txt again last nite.

how was work/ me=ok

i really do hope your doing well/me=are you

sometime/ me why sometimes?

i dont have room to breathe here/me=thats to bad.

sorry i txt im going to bed now/me= goodnite

[Sparky2Blame?]

I'm extremely analitical.  When I was at a similar place a while back, I would have read and re-read those texts and tried to figure out what the subtext was and the tone behind every word.  Maybe a bit unhealthy, in retrospect.  ... . part of the eggshells.

I knew my ex pretty well and could somewhat guage what she was feeling by the way she worded things or what she did or didn't say.  Or what she would ask or not ask.  Not always; but most of the time.

You know her better then most.  Whats your gut telling you, if you ask youself... . why is she reaching out to me?

[Clearmind]

you mention she is an exg/f - are you wanting to remain friends simply? If so, what to do would look quite different.

[simplyasiam]

hello sparky. my gut says whats she up to this time? 

she always drops hints when she about to pull something crazy. maybe she just doing a checking in to make sure ill still be here or maybe shes just being a good person and making sure some one she use to love is doing ok. i really dont know

i do know this is kinda how many of our recycles has started before but most of the other times she would start with the ... . i miss you or do you still love me. much more to the point.