Stay or Go?

[believeimagoodhusband]

Anyone ended up happier divorced from BPD wife?  Got 2 young children.  Cant get past the idea of not seeing them daily.

Been married 12 yrs, always felt wife was mean/selfish, sort of took advantage of me, but I overlooked it as PMS, etc.  Last 6 months have been awful, she is basically riding me about something everyday.  I can do no right, she does no wrong.  Constant raging, diatribes, emails, texts.  Has already started distortion campaign, her family and friends avoid any communication with me.  She frequently tells me, it's over, she has seen a lawyer, divorce is inevitable or imminent.  I started looking for answers on the web about 4 months ago, started seeing a clinical psyd, finally got her to go to "couples counseling".  Not officially diagnosed, but doc is 99% sure she is BPD/NPD or significant traits.  Of course, we haven't mentioned those terms to her yet.  Would really like to stay married and keep my family together, but the more enlightened I become, the more I am thinking it is unrealistic. 

[desperatehubby]

oh man not gone yet... . 7 years married... . no kids though

but going through the same dilemma... .

But my mind seems to be blocking any feelings for her out... . almost to make me go because it's supposed to happen... .

[Rapt Reader]

Hi again, believeimagoodhusband  

I'm glad you found your way to this Undecided Board; your story should receive more replies here because everyone posting is dealing with the same kinds of behaviors that you are with a significant other. While you are reading on this Board, please remember to check out the Links to the right --------> and the pinned threads (SUGGESTED READINGS FOR DECIDING and Decision Making Guidelines) at the top of the listings here.

Please keep reading, posting, and asking your questions... . It really will help!