"That will be the last contact we need."

[twojaybirds]

My dd texted me this week asking for her ss card and birth certificate.  Both in the car which I 'repo'ed' from her when she didn't have the insurance money including a 3 week extension.

Somehow she needs her birth certificate at all times.  It concerns me because she also has a trail of 1,000s of dollars she wires to who know where and she does not make that kind of money.

Anyways,  she was mad I took the car. After I mailed her her certifcate, she texted me with "That will be the last contact we need."

I wonder how long this will last.  She has an apartment, is a fulltime college student with a dorm and meal ticket and a job (and a leech of a boyfriend)

I think about the holidays and want to make plans for me, knowing it is the best, however there is that mother in  me that says be flexible and ready to accomodate her if she returns.

UGH  why can't these rocks ever land next to soft spot... I am tired of this hard option... .

Our objective is to better understand the struggles our child faces and to learn the skills to improve our relationship and provide a supportive environment and also improve on our own emotional responses, attitudes and effectiveness as a family leaders

[Rapt Reader]

Hi, twojaybirds... .

That's too bad about all the tension with your daughter. She needs her birth certificate on her at all times? That's different... . 

I hope you are able to figure out the holidays; they do seem to complicate things with our BPD loved ones. Will they come be with the family? Can they handle the stress and anxiety? My own BPDs36 has such a hard time at large family functions; the questions from relatives: What are you doing now? Are you working? How are you feeling? Anything new? They all seem to throw him into the fires of hades for some reason (well, we all know the reason... .he's embarrassed to be a "failure" in the eyes of everyone who doesn't understand him).

Maybe by the end of the year things will change a bit for you and she'll be in a better state of mind... .Or, maybe you should go ahead and make your own plans and take care of you this time. Whatever happens, I hope things get better and you find some peace with this troubling situation... .You deserve it!

(Oh yeah... .and don't forget to validate her and use S.E.T. when you see her  

It never hurts!)