Hi dzolkowski!
We have many members here who can empathize with your situation! It Is so hard to be the one always in the middle of the turmoil. I remember those days. The bad times tended to be right after school and by the time dh got home everything was back to normal(ish). He just didn't get what I was so upset about all the time. Does he validate and support you during these crisis times with your dd?
As far as schoolwork goes, what type of accountability can you add for her not doing her work? It can be crazy making to sit and force her to pay attention to her work. What can you allow/not allow her to do in accordance with her work? For instance, cell phones are a privilege that is earned by completing homework for the day. I will keep your phone until it's done. Your dh will be there in the evening. Could he collect the phone or item(s) at the end of every evening and you can return it to her after homework? That way she's responsible for getting her work done and you can do more productive things. Would that work in your house?
Do you have your own counselor? I think many members here have their counselors to help them through these very difficult times. How do you cope when you are feeling overstressed?
Please take some time and look through the lessons and tools on the right hand side of the screen. There is some good solid advice and maybe you'll find something new to try.
Keep posting! It really helps.
-crazed
