Diagnosed BPD, Public Awareness, Parental/Legal/Divorce Issues

[LA4610]

Hi All,

I have read alot of posts about those of you who have suffered all types of legal issues (divorce, custody, false allegations, etc etc) with your BPDexs. I really feel for y'all. I am curious... . at what point will societal and public awareness of BPD increase to the point where a DIAGNOSED BPD will be held accountable for their involvement in a relationship?

If a BPD knows they have the condition and withholds that from their partner shouldn't they be held accountable in legal situations?

[ogopogodude]

If a BPD knows they have the condition and withholds that from their partner shouldn't they be held accountable in legal situations?

BRILLIANT... ! And I do mean that... ! One could think of it as being hiv positive, ... and if they withhold that information to their mate, ... they could (in theory) face the legal and financial consequences. This really is a horrible analogy that I came up with , ... but it is something to think about. 

I realize that this is a place for healing and not to trigger any heated emotional arguments and such, ... but we are all adults here and it is something to ponder.

[Deep Impact]

Hi All,

I have read alot of posts about those of you who have suffered all types of legal issues (divorce, custody, false allegations, etc etc) with your BPDexs. I really feel for y'all. I am curious... . at what point will societal and public awareness of BPD increase to the point where a DIAGNOSED BPD will be held accountable for their involvement in a relationship?

If a BPD knows they have the condition and withholds that from their partner shouldn't they be held accountable in legal situations?

In the case of BPD being recognized, a lot of the victims are males - they are just expected to cop it, they can handle it, they are males!

If a BPD knew they had the condition and withheld it, this would benefit males - given that BPD is far more dominant in females (to my knowledge). So, it will not happen, there is no room for logic in society.

[Waddams]

I think it would set a dangerous precedent.  What else would anyone that had been treated for any mental issues have to disclose?  The condition to potential employers?  What about for driver's license?  What about for life insurance?  BPD's commit suicide much more often.  Would they get hit with higher rates?  What kind of discrimination would this open up anyone with a mental issue to?

I understand the principal, but BPD's are not mentally incompetent to the point they are not responsible for their own actions.  I would be weary of anything that could lead to any sort of implication to the effect "they are BPD so they can't do x, y, or z because they are not mentally competent enough."  BPD's are already good at denying responsibility.  I fear this would lead most of them to some new line of victimhood type thinking, where they blame their actions/conditions on their diagnosis and claim they can't do something that they really are capable of.  It's not just maintaining romantic/friendship/family relationships.  How long before a BPD is saying I can't work due to this dx, so I'm quitting and my partner just has to cater to taking care of me.  Or the government.  Or anyone else they can think of.  I think it would embolden their entitlement.

As for us non's that deal with BPD fallout, we had/have our own issues, that's why ended up with them, we need to own it, deal with it, grow out of our own unhealthiness, and not blame the BPDs.  We picked who we did, we could have picked different, we all ignored red flags we should not have, and paid the price.  That's on us, not the BPDs we picked.