public pleading of negligence

[Family Court Strategies: When Your Partner Has BPD OR NPD Traits.]

New email from N/BPDx this morning saying he is going to file a public pleading of negligence with the court next week.

Has anyone else experienced this?

[livednlearned]

New email from N/BPDx this morning saying he is going to file a public pleading of negligence with the court next week.

Has anyone else experienced this?

[Nope]

No. But I've heard of it. What is he saying you did this time? I'm assuming he is claiming some kind of intentional infliction of emotional distress? *eye roll*

He is hoping continuing to be a squeeky wheel will eventually win him some grease at this point. I doubt it will do anything but get one more judge angry with him. That is, if it even ever sees the light of day to begin with.

[maxen]

i googled it, but i don't understand how it would apply. whose negligence? yours? did you thoughtlessly drop a heavy weight on his foot? has it anything to do with your son?

[livednlearned]

Looking at it from BPD logic, he is triggered by me having a boyfriend. His second email says (using my bf's full name... . not sure how he knows his last name, but it's too late now), "Ah, so here is the point of liar and cheat -- what will you tell him about the risk of taking you on as a lover-for-hire?"

I guess that's good that he wrote that, right? In case I can get a restraining order for harassment? It seems clear that he is saying it is a risk for me to have a boyfriend because N/BPDx will take that person to court.

Also, these emails always come at night after he's been drinking. I have thousands of them, literally thousands.

I don't know how restraining orders work for harassment, whether that is different than a regular restraining order?

A friend wrote to say that he cannot file anything without permission of the court. How could I be this far along in court stuff and not know that, I don't know. I'm guessing he would have to show something substantial enough to warrant a pleading.

It's not that I think any of this will amount to anything, it's the exhaustion of blocking his moves, whether just by mentally dealing with him, or by actually doing something through the court system.

Bleh.

[letmeout]

Where do the BPD's come up with this stuff? Mine did nothing but cause havoc and tell boldfaced lies to the Judge during our divorce. The Judge made him apologize to everyone in court at the end, even though the ex still acted completely justified in his actions. The level of their immaturity boggles the mind. 

[ForeverDad]

They're the immovable force and irresistible object, perceptions and entitlement - combined.

I recall one particularly difficult tenant I had to deal with peripherally when I lived in NYC - I look back and am fairly sure she was uBPD - who was always alternating between passivity and claiming Harassment for ever minor trigger.  I found out that legally harassment is a very strong term, more than you'd think.  If you can get a restraining or protection order based on those terms, do it.  I'm not sure how it would really change his behaviors, but it is an available tool.

[livednlearned]

They're the immovable force and irresistible object, perceptions and entitlement - combined.

I recall one particularly difficult tenant I had to deal with peripherally when I lived in NYC - I look back and am fairly sure she was uBPD - who was always alternating between passivity and claiming Harassment for ever minor trigger.  I found out that legally harassment is a very strong term, more than you'd think.  If you can get a restraining or protection order based on those terms, do it.  I'm not sure how it would really change his behaviors, but it is an available tool.

I think I'm reaching this point. I opted to not use it a few years ago when he sent over 100 messages overnight. But he was in court a few weeks ago, his third bite of the apple about not paying my legal fees, so the bailiff was on his way to put handcuffs on him. My L said it rattled n/BPDx, and he wrote a check on the spot.

The threat of jail seems to be the only thing he responds to.

[blue_skies_ahead]

I'm so sorry you're going thru such misery.   Big hugs!