I see small changes

[Parents! Get help here!]

so, I have been away for about a week, I was on vacation without BPDD. I feel like good things happened in that short week, but I'm trying not to get overly excited.

DD and DS had a disagreement on Wednesday, it got out of control and ugly very quickly, so even though I was away on vacation, they started calling and texting in rapid fire succession. I allowed them to work it out, I was 100 miles away and couldn't do anything about it anyway. And by the way, stepping away and letting them handle it was very difficult for me, I am a fixer by nature.

About an hour after the calling/texting stopped a I got another text from DS telling me that they , he and DD, had a texting conversation, he chose to remove himself from the situation and left the house. He copied part of that conversation and sent it to me. My DD apologized, saying that she was sorry, she was out of line and had lost control through no fault of his and that she really wanted to get along with him. I am very proud of that accomplishment, she came to her own realization, and that pleases me. DS answered that text, saying, I can live with that, and I am sorry too, I need to take more time to understand you better. Also  big step for him. He does not have BPD, and is usually not very accepting hers.

What I am trying to say is this, She is trying, she is giving more effort than I have ever witnessed from her before, for the first time in her life, I think she wants to recover. She has even asked if I Would go with her to the local college to speak with a financial advisor, another big step in self sufficiency. I am very proud.

I am seriously trying not to read too much into any of this, but it sure feels good knowing that they can will work through some of these issues without me, and that she can make progress if she chooses.

[tristesse]

so, I have been away for about a week, I was on vacation without BPDD. I feel like good things happened in that short week, but I'm trying not to get overly excited.

DD and DS had a disagreement on Wednesday, it got out of control and ugly very quickly, so even though I was away on vacation, they started calling and texting in rapid fire succession. I allowed them to work it out, I was 100 miles away and couldn't do anything about it anyway. And by the way, stepping away and letting them handle it was very difficult for me, I am a fixer by nature.

About an hour after the calling/texting stopped a I got another text from DS telling me that they , he and DD, had a texting conversation, he chose to remove himself from the situation and left the house. He copied part of that conversation and sent it to me. My DD apologized, saying that she was sorry, she was out of line and had lost control through no fault of his and that she really wanted to get along with him. I am very proud of that accomplishment, she came to her own realization, and that pleases me. DS answered that text, saying, I can live with that, and I am sorry too, I need to take more time to understand you better. Also  big step for him. He does not have BPD, and is usually not very accepting hers.

What I am trying to say is this, She is trying, she is giving more effort than I have ever witnessed from her before, for the first time in her life, I think she wants to recover. She has even asked if I Would go with her to the local college to speak with a financial advisor, another big step in self sufficiency. I am very proud.

I am seriously trying not to read too much into any of this, but it sure feels good knowing that they can will work through some of these issues without me, and that she can make progress if she chooses.

Our objective is to better understand the struggles our child faces and to learn the skills to improve our relationship and provide a supportive environment and also improve on our own emotional responses, attitudes and effectiveness as a family leaders

[trytrytry]

Wow, that is tremendous.  May I ask the age of the DD and DS?  When my DD28 lived with me, she had a melt down every time I went away.  Your DD and DS really seem to be growing up!

[tristesse]

 my dd is 30 and ds is 21, the Ds has had issues of resentment in the past and has not tried to understand. This was so awesome for me.

[Rapt Reader]

This event really is awesome, bp514etersen 

For both of your kids!

You did the right thing, letting them deal with it themselves; it seems they learned things you couldn't really have taught them without them living it themselves.

Good job 

[peaceplease]

Awesome!