I understand that it's court ordered ---- I just wonder the significance?
Is it to determine a change in support?
Or is it just informational?
Yearly exchanges of financial information could be a pretty exhausting endeavor when the co-parenting relationship is strained.
I believe it's informational but we are interested in it for a possible change in alimony (Not sure if we want to fight that fight or not - she will surely become "unemployed" if we do)
So, the reason I ask all of this is simply because "picking your battles" can sometimes be an artform.
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When my husband's ex-wife took on a new job and the hubs asked her how much she would be making ---- she replied with
"it's none of your business". Well... .technically it is. And technically she had to provide the information. And technically he was OK with the child support. So he figured as to what difference did it really make ---- and was the cost of legally intervening worth the reduction in child support (if it was even warranted)? My husband's court order also states he needs to carry a life insurance policy on his ex-wife. It's not financially beneficial (she's more of a liability then an asset), so he doesn't follow the order. It wouldn't make any sense for her to enforce it (or care) so it's just let go.
So I guess my question is why push it?
She's OK with lying. You've established that (the numbers don't add up). Is there a benefit financially to argue it? It also looks like she's providing the kids with some pretty great experiences (trips to Europe, camps, college). Complaining might make all of that stop so she can prove that she is impoverished.
It sounds like the main concern is the therapy? That might be what I'd focus all my energy on?
I say all this because I think he's fighting a fruitless fight-----that will cost you far more (emotionally and legally) in the end. How long until the alimony is done?
I actually started embracing the abilities of my husband's ex-wife to always figure out a way to pay/get that which she can not afford. The only time I got frustrated was the times that she was dishonest to the point it cost my family monetarily (i.e like demanding reimbursement for lunch money when the kids received free lunches through the school district). That's where the limits and boundaries come in.
She has a different value system then I do. I believe in honesty and working for my dollar. She doesn't.
I can't impose my values on her no more then she can impose hers on mine. I can't control how she conducts herself.
So if your SO ex's financial situation isn't really affecting you? Is there a way to just let her do her thing?