We had a great time

[PyneappleDays]

I'm not sure if these ever make it to the board, I hope I'm wrong

I've been trying to patch up very hurt feelings between my daughter and her stepfather (my husband).  He comes from a very strict no nonsense family.  This does not boad well with my daughter’s BPD.  They have (daughter and husband) said very hurtful things.

Yesterday was Canada Day.  We always spend it with my family in another town.  So I talked to my husband last week and told him I wanted daughter there.  I said I would make clear instruction for her so she understood.  They were you want to be treated like and adult so you need to be at the house at 10:30 sharp, you need to call your uncle and clear it with him if it's ok to bring 1 guest, you need to bring your own money and bring the host a gift, while you’re there you need to see your grandmother you and your guest are on your own until around 5ish then we're having supper then leaving.  You cannot smoke around me or on the property and absolutely no drinking.

She understood the rules we had no problem and everyone had fun.  We all had a great time with the festivities and family.  She got back to her place safely.

My daughter is 18 and lives on her own; despite my pleading to stay home and safe.

Our objective is to better understand the struggles our child faces and to learn the skills to improve our relationship and provide a supportive environment and also improve on our own emotional responses, attitudes and effectiveness as a family leaders

[Reality]

Outlining all of the expectations clearly... . Wow!  Sounds so good.  Organization makes such a difference.

Has your dd completed high school?  Tell us more of your story, if you like. 

Reality

[PyneappleDays]

No, she has not finished school; I keep on her about it.  She's on welfare not happy about that either.  She wanted her freedom and did not want to answer to anyone.  I told her no matter where she lived there would be rules.  She didn't believe me.

We have always been close.  She's been losing people.  I've told her that's because she's standing still and everyone is moving forward.  She has to finish school and work on a career choice.  She keeps digging in her heels.  She can do it at her pace, but there are still rules and welfare is only temporary.  It will catch up to her eventually.

H

[BioAdoptMom3]

It sounds like you are certainly a blessing in your SD's life!  Glad it all worked out so well!