Hi Deeno02,
You suffered a major loss. Have you checked the five stages of detachment to the right?------------------------------------------>
ACKNOWLDGEMENT [Stage 1]:
When we're dealing with a major loss or strong attachment, we begin our healing by acknowledging and working with our feelings. The feelings that are the stickiest aspects of attachment are:
the excited desire we feel when we want something,
the anxiety we feel about losing it, and
the sense of hopelessness that can arise when we fail to achieve it.
Acknowledgment doesn't just mean recognizing that we want something badly or that we're feeling loss. When you want something, feel how you want it—find the wanting feeling in your body.
Remember when you were feeling cocky about a victory and you beat your chest and said, "Me, me, me!"
Rather than pushing away the anxiety and fear of losing what you care about, let it come up and breathe into it the same way. And when you're experiencing the hopelessness of actual loss, allow it in.
Let yourself cry.
You had a long history together and things are still raw. I broke down in tears at the most unexpected places and times. It's a loss. It's OK to let those emotions come up.
Hang in there.
--Mutt
