I think it's not the end of the world it's just a bad stormthat we survived thru

[guy4caligirl]

Hey folks .

It's time if you're out for more than a month or two to start devaluating your exes the same way they did us .

Last night for the first time after four month I saw the light .

Why are we morning a cruel behavior of someone we were once with .

I am using a quote someone wrote from this site.

Once you realize that they are with someone else think of it this way : they are sleeping with ,  eating with , happy being with in love with and in their mind they are not hurting us , they just are who they are, they are more talented and capable to carry on with no remorse or empathy they just don't give a sh$t about us , it's their nature , just imaging too the sex they are having with the new guy while we are hurting just for a moment , picture her with that new guy and what she is capable of seducing him sexually I mean everything you saw and felt at that moment of having sex with her How she looked at you how she excuse my frankness how she went down on you just remember that seen and the look in her eyes at that time this is the light ,She is doing it for someone else .

That is the core of detaching how would you expect to enjoy being intimate with her again after you had that vision of her in that manner .

Realize that it's over you will be in her shoes yourself having sex and loving someone else just like she is and if you think that she does not think about you , You  are wrong she still hurts daily Shame for ever but we are soon to be recovered something she won't be capable of it's just so sad .

Do you want to think about her more or you want use this thought stopping instead ?

Guy4me .no more Cali I have to change that asap .

Thanks for reading !

[BrokenFamily]

Excellent observation! I think what is comes down to is our own emotional health. The guy I was 4 years ago prior to the relation___, would have laughed and walked away without blinking an eye. After 4 years of emotional abuse, walking on eggshells and trying to make someone happy you become emotionally devoted to your partner and less devoted to yourself. We have a (16mo) daughter so seeing her confused and struggle with separation anxiety makes the breakup even more difficult for me but at the same time it assures me that I need to heal myself in order to give our daughter all the love and stability she deserves.

[guy4caligirl]

 My S/16 flies a single engine plane , just when I get sad and want to change a bad thought I replay him flying over my head and doing awesome maneuvers in the air right in front of my eyes Please look forward to that baby to do amazing stuff latter you would be very proud I am sure , she deserve your love not him .

[Pingo]

My S/16 flies a single engine plane , just when I get sad and want to change a bad thought I replay him flying over my head and doing awesome maneuvers in the air right in front of my eyes Please look forward to that baby to do amazing stuff latter you would be very proud I am sure , she deserve your love not him .

It's really good that you can stop the rumination and change the thought to something that makes you happy, I think that is really important. 

I think we all thought of ourselves and our r/s as 'special' so it's hard for us to imagine that they are experiencing the same thing with someone else and maybe did so even before us.