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BPDFamily.com
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Romantic Relationship | Detaching and Learning after a Failed Relationship
> Topic:
trying to understand uf x had BPD or traits
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Topic: trying to understand uf x had BPD or traits (Read 574 times)
dobie
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What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Posts: 761
trying to understand uf x had BPD or traits
«
on:
December 30, 2014, 01:28:53 PM »
Is it possible for someone to have these traits and not have a cluster b PD or traits of BPD
shallow lack of empathy post BU
periods of idealization
inability to accept criticism
mood swings
irritability
over sensitivity
emotional immaturity
constant analysis of r/s work friends family "happiness"
mild paranoid thoughts
anxiety
low mood
feelings of not being happy
resentment
lack of trust
lack of introspection
blame and everything is justified
tit for tat behaviour
over reaction to any perceived slights
difficulty making and maintaining friendships
you always ... .You never
inability to be happy for long periods "i cant be happy incase something goes wrong"
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EaglesJuju
Retired Staff
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What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Parent
Posts: 1653
Re: trying to understand uf x had BPD or traits
«
Reply #1 on:
December 30, 2014, 02:11:47 PM »
Quote from: dobie on December 30, 2014, 01:28:53 PM
Is it possible for someone to have these traits and not have a cluster b PD or traits of BPD
shallow lack of empathy post BU
periods of idealization
inability to accept criticism
mood swings
irritability
over sensitivity
emotional immaturity
constant analysis of r/s work friends family "happiness"
mild paranoid thoughts
anxiety
low mood
feelings of not being happy
resentment
lack of trust
lack of introspection
blame and everything is justified
tit for tat behaviour
over reaction to any perceived slights
difficulty making and maintaining friendships
you always ... .You never
inability to be happy for long periods "i cant be happy incase something goes wrong"
Yes it is possible to have these traits and not have a cluster B personality disorder. Some of these characteristics can be applied to many people that suffer from depression, bipolar disorder, general anxiety disorder, etc. Also some of the traits are behaviors that even non-disordered people display such as, anxiety, inability to accept criticism. The difference between having traits and personality disorders is the pathological aspect.
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"In order to take control of our lives and accomplish something of lasting value, sooner or later we need to Believe. We simply need to believe in the power that is within us, and use it." -Benjamin Hoff
dobie
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What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Posts: 761
Re: trying to understand uf x had BPD or traits
«
Reply #2 on:
December 30, 2014, 02:47:16 PM »
Pathological? I don't understand
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EaglesJuju
Retired Staff
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What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Parent
Posts: 1653
Re: trying to understand uf x had BPD or traits
«
Reply #3 on:
December 30, 2014, 03:05:28 PM »
Pathological means that the these types of behaviors are excessive, in which they impair a persons life. These types of behaviors (maladaptive behaviors) begin at adolescence and early adult hood. Pathological behaviors and are somewhat stable across time and consistent throughout situations. Personality disorders are groupings of maladaptive behaviors/traits, ways of thinking or perceiving. For example, having anxiety every once in awhile would not fit underneath criteria for a personality disorder.
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"In order to take control of our lives and accomplish something of lasting value, sooner or later we need to Believe. We simply need to believe in the power that is within us, and use it." -Benjamin Hoff
dobie
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What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Posts: 761
Re: trying to understand uf x had BPD or traits
«
Reply #4 on:
December 30, 2014, 04:29:44 PM »
Quote from: EaglesJuju on December 30, 2014, 03:05:28 PM
Pathological means that the these types of behaviors are excessive, in which they impair a persons life. These types of behaviors (maladaptive behaviors) begin at adolescence and early adult hood. Pathological behaviors and are somewhat stable across time and consistent throughout situations. Personality disorders are groupings of maladaptive behaviors/traits, ways of thinking or perceiving. For example, having anxiety every once in awhile would not fit underneath criteria for a personality disorder.
Apart from lack of empathy (though she was never a big hearted person) those traits were consistent through the r/s in varying degrees and intensities so I assume that = pathological
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EaglesJuju
Retired Staff
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What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Parent
Posts: 1653
Re: trying to understand uf x had BPD or traits
«
Reply #5 on:
December 30, 2014, 05:01:03 PM »
Quote from: dobie on December 30, 2014, 04:29:44 PM
Apart from lack of empathy (though she was never a big hearted person) those traits were consistent through the r/s in varying degrees and intensities so I assume that = pathological
The construct and dimension of empathy varies. What I may perceive as empathy can differ greatly to how another person views it as. Clinically speaking, there are differences of the construct of empathy in the DSM-V. The variance depends on criteria for specific personality disorders.
I do not know if the behaviors are pathological.
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"In order to take control of our lives and accomplish something of lasting value, sooner or later we need to Believe. We simply need to believe in the power that is within us, and use it." -Benjamin Hoff
dobie
Offline
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Posts: 761
Re: trying to understand uf x had BPD or traits
«
Reply #6 on:
January 01, 2015, 05:42:42 PM »
Its so confusing to know if she was a moderate BPD er ?
Her paranoia even after the BU thinking I am going to try and get one over her playing the BU like a game of chess , statements like I used to hang on your every word now I don't ... You gave me moments of INTENSE happiness . etc
So many things that could be BPD traits ... .
But because she was not a low functioning or self harming and or seemed like we were together she only threatened to leave after a big fight . she never accused me of going to desert her but she had no trust after the infatuation stage wore off ...
Once she went to a friends to think after we had a big bust up , her friend turned on her after drinking heavily and I remember her coming home early sobbing and saying you are always there for me .
Its like she needs that ... Then when she gets new friends , job I'm no longer needed and I'm the cause of her anger / resentment .
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