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Before you can make things better, you have to stop making them worse... Have you considered that being critical, judgmental, or invalidating toward the other parent, no matter what she or he just did will only make matters worse? Someone has to be do something. This means finding the motivation to stop making things worse, learning how to interrupt your own negative responses, body language, facial expressions, voice tone, and learning how to inhibit your urges to do things that you later realize are contributing to the tensions.
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Author Topic: False allegation  (Read 929 times)
Panda39
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Gender: Female
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Romantic partner’s ex
Relationship status: SO and I have been together 9 years and have just moved in together this summer.
Posts: 3462



« Reply #30 on: March 27, 2015, 01:04:19 PM »

Good news... .Police have closed the case. No further action.  No charges.   No arrests.  Nothing. 

Phew. That's great news. Last thing you need right now is legal drama.

How are you doing right now?

Ditto  Smiling (click to insert in post)
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"Have you ever looked fear in the face and just said, I just don't care" -Pink
SES
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What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Posts: 332


« Reply #31 on: March 27, 2015, 01:06:58 PM »

Hi Livednlearned, one less thing to worry about!  I am pleased.  

It's still hard going.  She turned down a house sale... .and we lost our buyer.  I had a letter from her last week from her regarding her regrets and love... .But that quickly turned to venom.  

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livednlearned
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Gender: Female
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Family other
Relationship status: Married
Posts: 12866



« Reply #32 on: March 27, 2015, 01:14:02 PM »

Hi Livednlearned, one less thing to worry about!  I am pleased.  

It's still hard going.  She turned down a house sale... .and we lost our buyer.  I had a letter from her last week from her regarding her regrets and love... .But that quickly turned to venom.  

Her external actions are signs of how she feels about herself inside -- these are about her, not you. Although I know that does not mean much when you are the target, trying to get grown up tasks done like selling a house.

Does the Other Man know that you are still in the house?


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Breathe.
SES
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What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Posts: 332


« Reply #33 on: March 27, 2015, 01:28:14 PM »

I'm not sure. She spends half the week with him, the other half at home.  She has been with him over a year.  I'm sure he doesn't have the full story.  All very odd if he did.
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Pou
****
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What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Ex-romantic partner
Relationship status: Non existent. Co-habitat. She is extremely abusive and manipulative.
Posts: 344


« Reply #34 on: March 28, 2015, 04:48:07 PM »

I'm not sure. She spends half the week with him, the other half at home.  She has been with him over a year.  I'm sure he doesn't have the full story.  All very odd if he did.

Perhaps if you could some how disappeared or disconnected from her life, then the new man would become the target?  Does PDs work this way?
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SES
****
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What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Posts: 332


« Reply #35 on: April 02, 2015, 02:35:53 AM »

17 texts from her a couple of days ago. I responded with two.  She the suggested I was harassing her, and that she might take it further.   I'm now only going to communicate via lawyers.   
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ImaFita

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What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Posts: 40


« Reply #36 on: April 05, 2015, 05:41:08 AM »

17 texts from her a couple of days ago. I responded with two.  She the suggested I was harassing her, and that she might take it further.   I'm now only going to communicate via lawyers.   

I know of a guy I used to work with - got locked up for sending 'threatening texts'. He did 3 months in prison. I only found out because a relative works in a prison. I was absolutely shocked this guy was in prison. I know him well, he is far from violent.

Anyway, I found out that the day he got out of prison, he's wife texts him telling him that the kids missed him. He text something back, apparently regarding the kids, she went straight to the cops, they locked him up. Mind you, I live Australia. I'm sure other nations aren't as bad as Australia.
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ForeverDad
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Gender: Male
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Ex-romantic partner
Relationship status: separated 2005 then divorced
Posts: 18438


You can't reason with the Voice of Unreason...


« Reply #37 on: April 06, 2015, 07:27:43 AM »

17 texts from her a couple of days ago. I responded with two.  She the suggested I was harassing her, and that she might take it further.   I'm now only going to communicate via lawyers.

I know of a guy I used to work with - got locked up for sending 'threatening texts'. He did 3 months in prison. I only found out because a relative works in a prison. I was absolutely shocked this guy was in prison. I know him well, he is far from violent.

Anyway, I found out that the day he got out of prison, he's wife texts him telling him that the kids missed him. He text something back, apparently regarding the kids, she went straight to the cops, they locked him up. Mind you, I live Australia. I'm sure other nations aren't as bad as Australia.

"But I only texted/emailed/phoned back, I didn't initiate it!" is not a defense in most places.  Responding to contact is no excuse in my area too.  If you're ordered not to make contact, that includes ANY contact, even responses.  Clearly this father was set up so that his predictable automatic natural response overcame the legal advice he had received to continue following the order and terms of release to the letter.  He should have been warned about this tactic by his lawyer/solicitor and taken it to heart.
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Pou
****
Offline Offline

What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Ex-romantic partner
Relationship status: Non existent. Co-habitat. She is extremely abusive and manipulative.
Posts: 344


« Reply #38 on: April 14, 2015, 03:50:43 PM »

17 texts from her a couple of days ago. I responded with two.  She the suggested I was harassing her, and that she might take it further.   I'm now only going to communicate via lawyers.

I know of a guy I used to work with - got locked up for sending 'threatening texts'. He did 3 months in prison. I only found out because a relative works in a prison. I was absolutely shocked this guy was in prison. I know him well, he is far from violent.

Anyway, I found out that the day he got out of prison, he's wife texts him telling him that the kids missed him. He text something back, apparently regarding the kids, she went straight to the cops, they locked him up. Mind you, I live Australia. I'm sure other nations aren't as bad as Australia.

"But I only texted/emailed/phoned back, I didn't initiate it!" is not a defense in most places.  Responding to contact is no excuse in my area too.  If you're ordered not to make contact, that includes ANY contact, even responses.  Clearly this father was set up so that his predictable automatic natural response overcame the legal advice he had received to continue following the order and terms of release to the letter.  He should have been warned about this tactic by his lawyer/solicitor and taken it to heart.

At some point, it seems that the legal system is enabling the abuse from the PDs ... .

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