BPD 20yr old daughter 5th suicide attempt HELP

[Kimmom]

Hello... .I could really use some help. My 20 yr old daughter tried committing suicide for the 5th time on May 8th. She almost didn't make it this time. She cut us out of her life 2 1/2 years ago by blocking us from Facebook, changing her phone number, and she lives in a different state that's not even close. She went there to college and decided to move there. I've tried reaching out and that's why she blocked us. I have a few people that are in contact with her and keep us informed when something bad has happened. In the last few weeks I've found out the most disturbing information. She had been conversing with my cousin about her illness and how bad it has gotten over the last 6 months and no one has notified us... .Her parents. Luckily she met a few wonderful ladies in her last hospital stay that reached out to find us. She has been in and out of mental hospitals since Oct for suicide attempts/thoughts. She has been black listed from two of them for not following dr orders. She believed the medication wasn't helping her so she stocked it up and took 2 bottles and tries to take the third before she got sick. She told a friend she wanted to commit suicide and when she couldn't get ahold of my daughter she called 911. She was unconscious and was in ICU incoherent for 3 days. Now she's in a mental hospital. She's very depressed and has lost numerous friends due to her illness. She is living alone and working 25 hours. I don't know how she's keeping that job since she's been in thehospital so much. She's very intelligent. I have lost my mom (when I was 23) to suicide and my sister (2yrs ago). She's told people it's her destiny to be the third. The lady that's keeping me informed saw her yesterday and said she likes her dr and is on medication that seems to help. She even wants to write us a letter. I'm sorry but I'm not so secure in this. What happens when she goes home and doesn't have that 24 hour care and people to be around. She's been in 4 car wrecks ... .Totalling 2 cars. She's over eaten so she's gain so much weight.  My husband and I desperately want to get an attorney and declare her mentally incompetent so we can protect her. It costs around $5000 and we have to have 2 Drs stating she is. I'm so confused on what to do?  If I don't do it and she dies... .I'll never forgive myself... .But do I even stand a chance?  Please help.

Our objective is to better understand the struggles our child faces and to learn the skills to improve our relationship and provide a supportive environment and also improve on our own emotional responses, attitudes and effectiveness as a family leaders

[lbjnltx]

Hi Kimmom,

I'm sorry to hear that your daughter is in crisis so much in her life.  Being out of touch and far away must be adding to your feelings of helplessness. 

It's good that she wants to contact you again, it is a sign that she has some clarity from the fog of the disorder and depression and I can understand why you would not put much stock in this since she has been cycling in and out of suicidality for so long now.

I hope that reading the last 2 parts of this information can give you a direction to explore or address some questions you might have about involuntary commitment:

Crisis Safety Plan: when a family member has BPD

Do you see a way for the info in part 1 to be implemented (to any degree) for your daughter if she chooses to go back to her college town?

lbjnltx