Start of an interesting ride with wife and her FOO

[VIDEO: "What is parental alienation?"]

So... there is a rental house that I am still involved in with my wife and her FOO.

The lady did not pay her full rent.  We didn't find out because my wife's dad can only check his bank account when he is home... .he hasn't been home in a couple weeks.  (I have no idea why... .I used to try to help and explain things to him... .)

So... a week ago "he was sure" things were fine... even though nobody could get access to the account.

Apparently... .about half the rent wasn't paid.

My wife wanted me to write letters... do this and that.  I said I thought we should go knock on door and post notice... .right now... instead of debating what to do.

"There is no need for you to be belligerant... ." is what she said

I asked her to help me understand how taking action immediately was belligerent towards her?  And she started blathering on about other things... .and then started talking about what I thought about her and her family... .not pleasant.

I told her she could handle it herself or treat me properly and I would be glad to help... .and walked out.

A couple hours later... .she asks me what time I am going by the ladies house.  I said I was confused because we hadn't agreed to that being course of action... .but I would be happy to help.

I asked her if she would like to go with me... .

"I believe you can handle it... ." (notice the indirect answer). 

"I would like you to go with me so if you are not happy with what I have to say to the lady... you can add anything else you want to add... ."

she says... "I don't believe that will be necessary as long as you ... and then starts a long list of things... .I cut it off and said that If I'm handling it I would like to handle it... .or she can come with. 

She walked off... .

So... .I'm going to stop by... .but I'm really... really... .hoping we can kick this lady out... .sell the property... and be done with it.

Being in business with a pwBPD traits (at least my wife... .is essentially impossible if something takes coordination)

If she can do it all by herself... .it seems ok... .

If I do it all by myself... .it's ok

But where we have to compromise and work together... .it doesn't work.

I guess just a venting post... .

FF

[formflier]

So... there is a rental house that I am still involved in with my wife and her FOO.

The lady did not pay her full rent.  We didn't find out because my wife's dad can only check his bank account when he is home... .he hasn't been home in a couple weeks.  (I have no idea why... .I used to try to help and explain things to him... .)

So... a week ago "he was sure" things were fine... even though nobody could get access to the account.

Apparently... .about half the rent wasn't paid.

My wife wanted me to write letters... do this and that.  I said I thought we should go knock on door and post notice... .right now... instead of debating what to do.

"There is no need for you to be belligerant... ." is what she said

I asked her to help me understand how taking action immediately was belligerent towards her?  And she started blathering on about other things... .and then started talking about what I thought about her and her family... .not pleasant.

I told her she could handle it herself or treat me properly and I would be glad to help... .and walked out.

A couple hours later... .she asks me what time I am going by the ladies house.  I said I was confused because we hadn't agreed to that being course of action... .but I would be happy to help.

I asked her if she would like to go with me... .

"I believe you can handle it... ." (notice the indirect answer). 

"I would like you to go with me so if you are not happy with what I have to say to the lady... you can add anything else you want to add... ."

she says... "I don't believe that will be necessary as long as you ... and then starts a long list of things... .I cut it off and said that If I'm handling it I would like to handle it... .or she can come with. 

She walked off... .

So... .I'm going to stop by... .but I'm really... really... .hoping we can kick this lady out... .sell the property... and be done with it.

Being in business with a pwBPD traits (at least my wife... .is essentially impossible if something takes coordination)

If she can do it all by herself... .it seems ok... .

If I do it all by myself... .it's ok

But where we have to compromise and work together... .it doesn't work.

I guess just a venting post... .

FF

[Surg_Bear]

And she started blathering on about other things... .and then started talking about what I thought about her

THIS... .

This makes me absolutely crazy.  The blathering about things unrelated to the topic / discussion / argument; with the sole purpose to FOG me up, then cycling back to discuss what I think of her.

With her super accurate, never wrong,  BPD mind reading powers... .

I actually get chest tightness when this happens sometimes.

I'm going to drop dead of an MI someday because I will be unable to distinguish true cariogenic ischemic pain, and just being married to a woman with BPD.

I totally feel you on this one, FF.

Love,

Surg_Bear

[formflier]

 

Thanks... .read my other thread about the emails... .my wife seems to have convinced herself of another affair on my part... .

Of course it is all based on what she "knows" about what I think and feel about a particular person that I hired... .the last place I worked.

FF