frustration

[sweet]

My daughter was diagnosed with BPD but I was never informed until she got herself kicked out of DBT Therapy.  I do not know a lot about this disorder but eager to learn.  I have read an article about abuse and neglect during childhood.  I can honestly say my daughter was not abused and very much loved. She was molested in 1st grade by a teenage boy.  I talked to therapist then and she told me to forget about it. She said my daughter would suffer more if it was talked about.  I left her current doctor know and she also just ignored it.  I have no idea if my daughter remembers or not. Could this be the cause of BPD?  I am searching for answers.  I also can not take all the lying.  It breaks my heart not being able to trust my child. My daughter has suffered from Depression/Anxiety since she has frontal lobe damage from several concussions.  I would appreciate any help in understanding how to help my child.

Our objective is to better understand the struggles our child faces and to learn the skills to improve our relationship and provide a supportive environment and also improve on our own emotional responses, attitudes and effectiveness as a family leaders

[livednlearned]

Hi sweet,

Welcome to the site 

It sounds like your D was willing to try DBT, and she has let you know about the diagnosis on her own? There's so much to learn about this disorder, and I'm glad you now have an arrow to help point you to skills and lessons. It's also so common to want to know what caused our kids to be the way they are. How old is your daughter? Is she living with you at the moment? Do you have a support network in place for yourself?

Being lied to is an awful feeling -- people with BPD tell themselves just as many lies, it's a way to cope with intense shame and becomes automatic. Still, it is so painful for those of us who love and live with someone who is BPD.

I'm glad you found the site and hope you'll share more as you feel comfortable. You're not alone, and others here do genuinely care. 

LnL

[lbjnltx]

Hi sweet,

I'd like to join livednlearned in welcoming you to the Parent's Board and the community. 

I'm sorry that your daughter is living with this disorder and you are suffering alongside her, it is the common thread that binds us as a group.  We strive to decrease our suffering through skills and improve our relationships with our kids. 

It's hard to believe that therapists think the trauma your daughter suffered in first grade will just go away if it is ignored... .  What are your thoughts on this?

My daughter, now 18 remembers the finest of details from as far back as 4 years old... .

I look forward to hearing back from you.

lbj

[Rapt Reader]

Hello, sweet, and I'd like to join livednlearned and lbjnltx in welcoming you to this site

I'm really sorry for all of the stress and sadness you have been going through for so long... .How are things going today?

We would love to hear more of your story, updating us with your situation. We'd love to help you, sweet