Exhausted

[peace_4us]

Been married to Dr Jekyll and Mr Hyde for over two decades (BP II w/co-occurring PD - NPD/BPD - and all that comes with that - second child now going through trials that were diagnosed ADHD/OCD/Anxiety but after in-patient, signs point to BPD.  So tired of the rollercoaster ride.  Torn between how to help and how to survive the traumatic ride.  :'(

Our objective is to better understand the struggles our child faces and to learn the skills to improve our relationship and provide a supportive environment and also improve on our own emotional responses, attitudes and effectiveness as a family leaders

[lbjnltx]

Hi peace_4us,

I'm glad you decided to join the forum and post here on the Parenting Board.  I'm sorry that you are dealing with a BPD/NPD husband and that your child is also suffering from disorders.  That's a lot to deal with, especially in such close relationships, at the same time.

How old is your child that you are posting about?  What are the circumstances that has your child placed in inpatient care? Does your child live with you and your husband?

I look forward to your reply.

lbj

[livednlearned]

Hi peace_4us,

I wanted to join lbjnltx in welcoming you to the Parenting board 

It really is so exhausting to have both a spouse and child who struggles with their emotions and behavior. A book that has helped me understand so much is Blaise Aguirre's BPD in Adolescence: https://bpdfamily.com/message_board/index.php?topic=65571.msg628612#msg628612

Even if your son is pre-adolescent, or a young adult, I think this book is very insightful. Learning about BPD and working through different skills and tools does help, and these lessons can be applied to both your husband and your child.

I hope you'll let us know more when you feel comfortable sharing. 

LnL

[Elizabeth22]

Hi peace_4us - I read the title of your thread and can totally relate, so I decided to peek in. I am so sorry you have to deal with this and it can be so overwhelming that its hard to even post here and talk about it. My BPD person is an uBPD DIL wreaking havoc in our family now. Fortunately, we don't have to live with her. It must be so hard for you to have to deal with 2 people in your home, I couldn't imagine.

Are there things you can do to be kind to yourself? Treat yourself to something or go out and have some time for yourself? I know that may sound trite, and it probably is, but sometimes baby steps or little breaks might help.

I wish I could be more helpful. As a newbie myself, I can tell you I am finding relief and comfort on these boards, even if in short spurts. All of this can be so all-consuming and sometimes it just helps to let it out with people who understand. It took me a while before I could even do that here, but when I do, I am always treated warmly and compassionately.

Welcome