Hoping to find and provide support

[Parents! Get help here!]

Hello,

My 16yo daughter has BPD traits. In addition, she is in recovery for opiate addiction.  Her recovery seems to be going well. It is difficult communicating with her. She tends to interpret interactions, especially with me or my husband, in negative terms. We tend to "leave her alone" and let her do her thing.

I am looking forward to supporting and getting feedback from others in similar circumstances.

Thank you.

[CMG]

Hello,

My 16yo daughter has BPD traits. In addition, she is in recovery for opiate addiction.  Her recovery seems to be going well. It is difficult communicating with her. She tends to interpret interactions, especially with me or my husband, in negative terms. We tend to "leave her alone" and let her do her thing.

I am looking forward to supporting and getting feedback from others in similar circumstances.

Thank you.

Our objective is to better understand the struggles our child faces and to learn the skills to improve our relationship and provide a supportive environment and also improve on our own emotional responses, attitudes and effectiveness as a family leaders

[lbjnltx]

Hello CMG!  Welcome to the Parenting Board, glad to have you. 

Sorry to hear that your d16 has traits of BPD and glad to know she is in recovery for her addiction.  Is she attending any kind of regular therapy?  What kind?

lbj

[CMG]

My daughter has seen a handful of therapists, most recently one who had knowledge of DBT. We have since discontinued that therapy. My daughter would threaten not to go to weekly appointments. 

I am looking into group DBT for her. Insurance coverage is tricky. I feel overwhelmed just thinking about searching for a new therapist.

[lbjnltx]

DBT is a good therapy for people with intense emotions/self injury/suicidal ideation.

A full DBT program has 3 components for the patient:

Individual

Group

Phone support

When my daughter lived at home attending therapy was a requirement.  There were times she refused to go and I would go by myself to get support... .time well spent and no appointment missed.  Since we  had to travel almost an hour to the therapist we would plan something my daughter was interested in doing after therapy... .a trip to the mall, going to an arcade, out to eat... .  As I mentioned, it didn't always work and if she missed for no reason except being stubborn, she had no privileges the next day... .no friends, no outings, just home after school/stay home. 

Has tying therapy to privileges (positive) and consequences (no privileges earned) been at all affective with your daughter?

lbj

[CMG]

My daughter is a homebody. Outside of her IOP meetings 3x/wk and AA meetings, she stays at home. She has few friends outside of IOP but has many contacts she's made during inpatient treatment, etc.  Revoking cell phone privileges could be a consequence for missing therapy appointments. She loves sushi. I'm sure I could entice her with sushi after appointments

I need to get her on board for individual and group DBT right away. She is bound and determined to move out the day she turns 18, which is 3 months before she will graduate from high school. Time is running out.

I have two sons as well, an18yo high school senior and a 13yo 7th grader.  They are doing fine. 

I've been trying to find a therapist close to home that offers group DBT. Not easy to find. Will probably need to look into Seattle area for individual/group as there are more therapists in the city.