My Ex BPD spit in my face

[VIDEO: "What is parental alienation?"]

We were together 18 months. There were so many ups and downs. I truly loved him! We went on 5 major vacations and so many weekend trips to Philly and AC and NYC. I guess I see the impulsive spending . Usually it was me paying for the majority of it. He was in the priesthood and left. The red flags I overlooked in the beginning figuring he didn't have much dating experience. That he lost his 20's to the  6 years in seminary and priesthood for 4 years. It was a whirlwind. He got so close so fast. and went to CA, CO and Disneyworld 3 times. He had some strange obsession with going to Disney. This past winter he got into gambling a lot. I thought he was getting an addiction. We would go sometimes 3 times a week. But he could also just stop for periods without wanting to go. I went where ever he wanted. He would call me wonderful beautiful and be very affectionate . But then call me Stupid ___ing b___ and ___ing idiot, and say such cruel things. He would get in my face screaming and it was all so surreal. I wanted to break up many times but he would cry and I would forgive him. This last fight he was screaming at me and I wasn't screaming back I was just frozen in fear and then he deliberately spit in my face. And I was in shock. We broke up and I couldn't believe it was really over. He didn't come running back this time. But then he wanted to keep in touch weekly and wanted to be there for me, Please I think that was more about his abandonment fears. Because he after we broke up initially he didn't call when he knew my elderly father fell, he didn't call or text on my birthday . and he impulsively drove down to disney world after our break up. I should feel relief but I feel rejected and lost and hurt. Only now am I seeing the signs of BPD. He changed careers 4 times in 18 months and had no friends but family members. He would say I was so negative and had the bad temper. Pushing it all on me. He always would have his mom give him money to pay for car repairs or his portions of trips and thought nothing was wrong with that. He is 34. and his step mom opens his bills and bank statements . Do you think He really has BPD. I can't believe he ever was a Catholic Priest. He was very selfish and entitled . Please I need some answers 

[Itstopsnow]

We were together 18 months. There were so many ups and downs. I truly loved him! We went on 5 major vacations and so many weekend trips to Philly and AC and NYC. I guess I see the impulsive spending . Usually it was me paying for the majority of it. He was in the priesthood and left. The red flags I overlooked in the beginning figuring he didn't have much dating experience. That he lost his 20's to the  6 years in seminary and priesthood for 4 years. It was a whirlwind. He got so close so fast. and went to CA, CO and Disneyworld 3 times. He had some strange obsession with going to Disney. This past winter he got into gambling a lot. I thought he was getting an addiction. We would go sometimes 3 times a week. But he could also just stop for periods without wanting to go. I went where ever he wanted. He would call me wonderful beautiful and be very affectionate . But then call me Stupid ___ing b___ and ___ing idiot, and say such cruel things. He would get in my face screaming and it was all so surreal. I wanted to break up many times but he would cry and I would forgive him. This last fight he was screaming at me and I wasn't screaming back I was just frozen in fear and then he deliberately spit in my face. And I was in shock. We broke up and I couldn't believe it was really over. He didn't come running back this time. But then he wanted to keep in touch weekly and wanted to be there for me, Please I think that was more about his abandonment fears. Because he after we broke up initially he didn't call when he knew my elderly father fell, he didn't call or text on my birthday . and he impulsively drove down to disney world after our break up. I should feel relief but I feel rejected and lost and hurt. Only now am I seeing the signs of BPD. He changed careers 4 times in 18 months and had no friends but family members. He would say I was so negative and had the bad temper. Pushing it all on me. He always would have his mom give him money to pay for car repairs or his portions of trips and thought nothing was wrong with that. He is 34. and his step mom opens his bills and bank statements . Do you think He really has BPD. I can't believe he ever was a Catholic Priest. He was very selfish and entitled . Please I need some answers 

[AsGoodAsItGets]

I don't know if he is BPD,  do know he is unhealthy.  Protect yourself and erase this person from your life.  Love you and heal

[Itstopsnow]

Thank you for your kind words. I feel so beside myself.  :'(