Advice

[dacoming]

Does anyone deal with a BPD spouse who constantly accuses them of trying to annoy them on purpose and having every move labeled as mean or malicious?  My wife does this to me about everything and always turns into a raging incident.  Currently my wife is saying she wants a divorce again with her main reasons being the constant annoying and not always knowing what she is trying to say or not knowing what she is saying before she says it.  She keeps saying I need to change but how can you change something you are not doing?  She gets annoyed about everything literally and she magnifies things to the 10th power.  I know she expects me to try to beg her to stay for the millionth time but I'm at a loss of what to say. I am at the point where I want to just let the marriage go because I hate living like this.  How should I express it?

[formflier]

 

Don't react... .stay very calm and centered.

Let her know you heard her and that you support her in whatever action she needs to take to take care of herself.

You can change this around a bit with your own words... .just make sure that:

1.  She knows she is heard... .it's ok to listen as long as it's not abusive.

2.  You express support of her figuring this out and taking action... .NOT that she figures out that you need to take action.

FF