Changing meds - advice welcome

[wendydarling]

Hello

My daughter is reducing depression meds over the next month to be able to start take psychotic meds in a months time.  She has been living in crisis for the last 3 weeks.

Any thoughts?  She is fighting as best she can for her life, to be well. Bottom line is, she or I will admit her to ensure she is safe, if needed.

I'd welcome to hear from anyone who can share what a change in meds (above) produces for our loved ones.

WDX

Our objective is to better understand the struggles our child faces and to learn the skills to improve our relationship and provide a supportive environment and also improve on our own emotional responses, attitudes and effectiveness as a family leaders

[michmom]

I can appreciate how difficult it is that your daughter has been in crisis for three weeks.  The clock seems to stand still and just taking a breath can seem like a painful experience.  No one can predict what your daughters experience will be like.  Ask lots of questions of your daughters doctor on what to expect and read everything you can about withdraws.  The withdraw sometimes is dependent on how long the medication has been taken.  I know it is sometimes difficult to keep a positive attitude but my BPD daughter mirrors my emotions sometimes and if she senses that I am concerned she amplifies the concern.  Re-assure her that you are behind the decision to make the changes and that you will be walking the path with her every step of the way.  Always put safety first.  Does your daughter have a diagnoses? How old is she? I

[middleman]

Everyone reacts differently when changing meds.  For my BPDs it wasn't so bad.  He was mostly sleepy.  Be supportive and watch her closely.  Changing meds is usually a positive move forward.

[wendydarling]

Thanks for your replies michmom and middleman.  My daughter is 27BPD and has been on citalopram for 14 months.  She manages her treatments directly, I don't get to speak with the Dr. She met with a psychiatrist on Thursday as she has internal and external voices and will be taking Amisulpride in a months time, I'm sure he will have explained side effects, my daughter thinks she has just forgotten as she has only slept a few hours a night since Monday. She is still at the crisis home but came for a home stay last night ... .she slept 12 hours and is happy today  

We had a good chat this morning and her plan is to ask about possible side effects of reducing citalopram with her GP on Monday.

Meanwhile I took your advice and found this on line - citalopram ":)iscontinuation symptoms if you stop taking this drug (particularly when abrupt), such as dizziness, tingling, numbness or 'pins and needle' sensations, headache, anxiety and feeling sick".  - I have not shared this information as our agreement is it's not my role to 'fix' her but as you'll appreciate I need to know what might be ahead for my own well being, especially considering she lives at home. I recognise it's different for everyone.

Michmom - interesting you mention "mirroring emotions" - I have seen my daughter gradually deteriorate during her stay in the crisis home, I see her interactions with a couple of the patients and the emotional dysregulation follows. Just one night at home and she is calm, happy and relieved to have slept. She thinks they may consider discharging her next Thursday/Friday if all goes well the next few days.  

Daughter has found a coping mechanism to deal with the voices, to curl up tightly in a blanket, in the dark with her headphones - and let it pass. She feels safe.

For now, everyday is different and I'm generally sleeping longer to recover.

WDx

[Lollypop]

Hi WD

I've experienced my BPDs going clean twice. I know it wasn't prescribed medication but there were still withdrawals. I'm writing to just say how brilliantly you're doing and, as you say, forewarned is forearmed.

The nights were the worst for my BPDs. I'd get up and sit with him as he was highly anxious and doubting his strength to get through. This really helped him. I'd chat trying to get his attention elsewhere and when i could see this failed (which sometimes happened) I would read from the Internet of others experiences, filtering to positives as I went, he'd listen as "they really knew what it felt like". I kept consistent with the message all things pass. He'd eventually calm and go back to bed after a few hours. These occasions reduced over a few weeks.

I look back now, was this "fixing"? I prefer to look at it as helping in a dark hour.

He drank a lot of water, showered as the released toxins sit in the skin, ate well, kept safe. He liked to watch motivational videos on YouTube during the day.

I hope this helps. Take care of yourself

L

[wendydarling]

Hi Lollypop

Many thanks for sharing your experience and support.  You've given me some great practical advice, it's just what I need, my feet on the ground, my head back in my gear and feeling strong. I've been feeling super anxious since Thursday about what's ahead with change in meds, it's the thought that she 'may be' even more vulnerable to the BPD symptoms than she is now, and now feels to me like the worst it's been to date. Minded I do not join her emotional crisis, but do as you did be there 'in a dark hour' should it happen. I'm expecting her to reduce the drug from this Monday, that means the first four/five days she will be at the crisis home, I'm away Thurs-Sunday and she is planning to stay with friends.  Ok, I have just talked myself round to look at this positively rather than from a position of fear around something that might not even happen.  Having spent part of the morning carrying out more research, I'm now done in  , it's time to get back into my present moment and get on with my day.

Thanks again to all, it's really helped me work through and rid this unnecessary anxiety from my system.

I feel so much better now  and hope you are having a good day.

Lollypop, I hope your son's assessment proceeds as planned tomorrow.

WDx

[Lollypop]

Hi WD

it's very hard but necessary to stand back, not fix. My Bpds arranged a face to face assessment, due tomorrow. He won't be attending as he's also arranged to work. Can you hear my sigh? He's supposed to call them beforehand if he can't make the appointment. I'd be very surprised if he will. I can only hope that eventually it will happen.

As you say, try and stay in the present, today is calm.

L

[wendydarling]

H Lollypop

Yes, I hear your sigh. I'm very sorry to hear your son is unable to help himself tomorrow. You've worked so hard and have been very clear in your communications. I wonder how many BPds wait till crisis point, like my daughter before seeking help and acknowledging they can't manage getting well on their own?

Present, calm and sending you peace tonight.

WDx 

[SlyQQ]

What is her relationship status ? It could be the single most important thing in determining a course of action.

[Lollypop]

Hi WD

I think lack of action is predominantly due to BPD and other factors like maturity but there's an element of human nature in there too.

I think of it as if a frog sat in a pan of water set over a fire. When do they jump, if at all? We've all been there, in one way or another - poor relationships, troubles at work etc.

That fear of crisis that we all have is inbuilt but crisis does always bring change. When you've been stuck for so very long, it can be liberating and scarily feeds that fixer mode.

L

[wendydarling]

Hi Lollypop, frogs sitting on a slowly heating pot is a wonderful analogy, thank you. My daughter had her bum scolded after 13 years of sitting she has taken action.

Daughter came home today after a stay in the hospital and 3.5 weeks in the crisis home for women.

Meds update

From tomorrow:

Reduction from 40mg of citalopram to 20mg for the next 7 days then stop 

From tomorrow begin 50mg of Amisulpride a day and keep it going ... .

Hoping this works it's self through though I have read Amisulpride may promote mania and it has no serotonin.

Panic, me? Nah, never   It's just the journey to getting well.

Wishing everyone a peaceful evening.

WDx

Our objective is to better understand the struggles our child faces and to learn the skills to improve our relationship and provide a supportive environment and also improve on our own emotional responses, attitudes and effectiveness as a family leaders

[Lollypop]

Hi WD

Logged on to say that I've been thinking about you this week and found your update post from last night.

It all sounds very positive and a realistic viewpoint. i sincerely hope everything goes smoothly and calmly in the days ahead. It's really fabulous news, yes there's challenges ahead but she definitely can make her way to a better life. It warms my heart and gives me hope.

L

[wendydarling]

Oh dear, I wrote a detailed update earlier today and it appears to have made it's way to the outer stratosphere ... .   

Lollypop many thanks for thinking of us and for your support. All is calm and meds change is going well. You are working so hard, I see that. When you are off balance you get back and work harder ... .In your lethargy kills  thread you said  "I feel a lot better today" I felt and shared your relief with you. 

A good reminder for us all from lbj today, thanks lbj. WDx 

While families wait... wait... .wait... .for DBT treatment:

Learning the basics of DBT to practice/model with/for our kids/adult kids:

Here on the site: 

Triggering, Mindfulness and Wisemind

Untangling the Internal Struggles, Dialectical Dilemna

and more.

www.dbtselfhelp.com is a self directed online resource.

Being mindful that our kids waiting for DBT professional help could look at the info, decide it isn't for them and withdraw themselves from the wait list... .we can share the resources available online with them.  A more foolproof option would be for us to educate ourselves, practice the DBT skills in our own lives, benefit from them ourselves while modeling them for our kids/adult kids.

Win Win ... .very hard to come by in our lives with our disordered and beloved kids.

lbj