My adult daughter

[TearyD]

I have been all alone dealing with my daughter with BPD (she was diagnosed when she was 11) since I feel she was born, she is now 20.  My husband does not understand her disease and refuses to learn anything about it.  He feels that she just needs to straighten up.  I have almost left him several times because of the way he treats her but I also have a "normal" daughter who is 17.

We have found a great therapist (after quite a few fails) to help d20 and she has been seeing her for about 8 years.  She has been on all types of medication which will help for a awhile and then needs changing.

Today is one of those days that I am wondering if its worth seeing her miserable every day and having her own family treat her as a freak.

Our objective is to better understand the struggles our child faces and to learn the skills to improve our relationship and provide a supportive environment and also improve on our own emotional responses, attitudes and effectiveness as a family leaders

[lbjnltx]

Hi Tearyd



I'm sorry to hear that your husband doesn't understand or accept that his child needs extra care and support.  Regardless of the diagnoses, each of our kids are individuals and need to parented as such.  Dads oftentimes find it extremely difficult to accept that their children have disorders.  Maybe it is because they see it as a reflection on themselves... .or it is just too painful to accept.  :'(

In what way does the family treat her as a "freak"?

lbjnltx

[landslide]

Hi TearyD,

I have felt what you are feeling many times.  I am also having a really down day about my own daughter's situation, even though I know I am doing everything I can to help her.  Coping with this level of mental illness requires so much emotional energy, and it is hard to see your child go through so much pain and know that many people (including family members) do not understand or accept the situation.  It sounds like you are doing all the right things for your daughter in trying to support her and connect her to the right treatments.  Sending you hope for continued strength and know that you are not alone.