My 32 yr old son has symptoms of anti social behaviors

[Debt]

I am at lost at how to deal with my son. Usually I just let him talk. If you disagree he usually will verbally abuse me. Like call me stupid or say things like o"once again I'm right and your wrong" or he says things like I have told that seven times already if you ask a question. His irritability level is very high , unless is is stoned on pot. He gets so mad he cusses people out if they are in his path doing anything he thinks is wrong. He has been kicked out of airports cause of his anger problem. So most of the time I just try to listen while he tells me how everything is someone else's fault no matter what Thr situation it is always the other person or clinic or doctor or boss or friends fault

Our objective is to better understand the struggles our child faces and to learn the skills to improve our relationship and provide a supportive environment and also improve on our own emotional responses, attitudes and effectiveness as a family leaders

[Naughty Nibbler]

I am at lost at how to deal with my son. Usually I just let him talk. If you disagree he usually will verbally abuse me. Like call me stupid or say things like o"once again I'm right and your wrong" or he says things like I have told that seven times already if you ask a question. His irritability level is very high , unless is is stoned on pot. He gets so mad he cusses people out if they are in his path doing anything he thinks is wrong. He has been kicked out of airports cause of his anger problem. So most of the time I just try to listen while he tells me how everything is someone else's fault no matter what Thr situation it is always the other person or clinic or doctor or boss or friends fault

Hey Debt  

Welcome to BPD Family!

Sorry to hear about your son's behavior.  Has he always behaved this way, or has it escalated over the years?  How about his school years? Any history of mental illness in the family?  Could he have a substance abuse problem that you are unaware of?

Here is a link to the DMS BPD Definition https://bpdfamily.com/content/borderline-personality-disorder and another overview IS IT BPD?  Other than his anger/rage which behaviors does he appear to have?

The situation it is always the other person or clinic or doctor or boss or friends fault

 You mention doctor and clinic.  Is you son currently under care for a condition or has he been in the recent past?

If you look to the right on the page, you will find several links to helpful information. The communication information and tactics can be helpful in general, even with dealing with people without BPD.  We can't change others, but we can set BOUNDARIES and change the way we interact and react to people in our lives.

The "blame game" is something that people with BPD tend to do (pwBPD).  I know that my uBPD sister does that. My now deceased father had issues with anxiety and depression; but after researching BPD, I'd have so say that he has some of the tendencies.  He didn't appear to have enough of the traits to wear the BPD label.

My dad didn't rage in public, buy he he sure could at home.  Nit Picky, critical, grouchy, crabby and angry all fit my dad.

[Lollypop]

Hi debt

I'm sorry that you're in this situation. My BPDs is 25 and was quiet and doesn't generally rage.  But he does "bark" when very agitated.  We live in the UK and he's been angry since the public voted to leave the European Union. This is a huge thing for our country.  My BPDs has been very emotional about it.  Yesterday I realised that he was shouting at me (very unusual).  It wasnt about me, he was angry about a family friend who cut him out (6 years ago) because of my BPDs unacceptable behaviour.  I immediately realised I need to learn how best to cope with this new loud behaviour. It was unpleasant and I'm not sure how I'd have felt if it was directed at me.

Our sons sound very similar. Everybody else is an idiot, he's always right, it's never ever his fault.  He smokes a LOT of weed.

My BPDs lives at home (since mid-Dec).  he has no financial management skills We're working on getting him to a point he can live independently.

I just wanted you to know you're not in your own.