I got away with an amicable divorce

[Family Court Strategies: When Your Partner Has BPD OR NPD Traits.]

Hi guys, I am not coming here to gloat but I was able to get away painlessly from my Ex wBPD. Here is how I did it:

It might sounds like a dirty tactics but I waited for her to be in a relationship with someone before moving in with the divorce papers. For months and months on end I had to chase her to make her sign them so finally when I found out she was in a relationship with someone, I moved in and got her to sign the papers, and booked us a date in court the following month (we had no kids, so it was quite easy to do).

Thank god I did that because the week after our court date, she broke up with her dude and she starting saying she wanted our divorce application to be reversed, that it was made under duress blalbla, (which is what not. She just agreed because she was in a good mood with her new dude, and the judge saw right throught it and denied it to her).

Anyhow, just wanted to say that there is a light at the end of the tunnel, but you have to wait for the right time to move in. Yes she is still contacting me, harassing me now and then but at least now we are divorced and I can ignore her.

Good luck to all the people trying to walk away from such a relationship out there. Wait for your time and make a move quick if you can !

[llor]

Hi guys, I am not coming here to gloat but I was able to get away painlessly from my Ex wBPD. Here is how I did it:

It might sounds like a dirty tactics but I waited for her to be in a relationship with someone before moving in with the divorce papers. For months and months on end I had to chase her to make her sign them so finally when I found out she was in a relationship with someone, I moved in and got her to sign the papers, and booked us a date in court the following month (we had no kids, so it was quite easy to do).

Thank god I did that because the week after our court date, she broke up with her dude and she starting saying she wanted our divorce application to be reversed, that it was made under duress blalbla, (which is what not. She just agreed because she was in a good mood with her new dude, and the judge saw right throught it and denied it to her).

Anyhow, just wanted to say that there is a light at the end of the tunnel, but you have to wait for the right time to move in. Yes she is still contacting me, harassing me now and then but at least now we are divorced and I can ignore her.

Good luck to all the people trying to walk away from such a relationship out there. Wait for your time and make a move quick if you can !

[Turkish]

It sounds like there are multiple lessons here.  You were smart enough to understand the disordered behavior for what it is and use that knowledge to your advantage,  even though you probably guessed how it would turn out.  A lot of the members here have pwBPD so severe,  it doesn't work,  but good for you. 

In a way,  I engage the dysfunction (father-daughter r/s, and also her narcissistic/prideful traits). It's a fine line to walk since I have a little less than 14 more years where she could file for more child support with no change of circumstances because we agreed to below guideline support.  The balance goes into their college funds,  which doesn't factor into support, so my FOG was shirt: "I won't be able to continue to contribute,  but since the extra money will be going to you, feel free to start your own 529s or ESAs for the kids." For whatever reason, she didn't want to do that.